Least Expected
by We're Here and We're Queer
Summary: Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." AU, SLASH. SBRL.
1. One

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo_  
**Rating: **_R/NC17 (all NC17 parts will only be on The link to the profile page there can be found in our profile.)_  
**Disclaimer: **_We do not own Harry Potter._  
**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.**_  
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In the home of James Potter resided a small going-away party for Sirius Black. The guests were very few and consisted of mainly Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew. James and Sirius included, of course. Low volume swing music was playing from an old stereo Sirius picked from the trash and large piles of new stamps were in the center of the carpet, waiting to be divided and traded amongst one another.

Remus handed James the stamp album that fell from the bed and wiped his cheek with the sleeve of his oversized plaid shirt. Glancing to his left at Peter, he frowned softly. The blonde was packing away Mrs. Potter's homemade fudge as if there were no tomorrow, chocolate spit flying from his mouth and into poor Remus's vicinity.

"You know, Pete," Sirius said, flicking a tangled and knotted lock of jetty hair from his face and squaring his broken glasses on the bridge of his nose. He was tall, gangly and had the messiest hair in the town. "You should really cut down on the chocolate. You're turning into quite the piglet."

Peter looked up at Sirius and shrugged, wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his shirt. "I can't help that James' mom makes the best fudge," he commented, using his finger to swipe more of the fudge from the plastic box.

Remus shook his head, pushing some of his hair back behind his ear. "Can you at least keep it in your mouth?" he asked politely. Nodding, Peter went back to eating the fudge.

"No wonder my mother loves having him over, he eats everything that we won't." James chuckled.

Sirius stretched, pushing his jean-clad legs in front of him and creating a "V". He gave James an exasperated look.

"It's not so much of what we _won't _eat; it's more along the lines of him beating us to it." Sirius watched Peter in gross and ill-hidden annoyance. "Though, when Peter gets to it, I don't want to eat it... it's disgusting. Look at him; he's drooling into the container."

Peter shot Sirius a wounded look before pushing the dish aside with a frown. He wiped his hands on his pants and looked at them, mildly miffed. James looked at the dish in alarm.

"I don't mean to be, well, _mean _or anything... but wasn't slobbering in her dishes the reason she chased you out of our house with disinfectant last week?"

Remus cracked a small grin, laughing quietly and leaning against the uncomfortable dresser.

"Come on, guys. We didn't come here to discuss Peter's eating habits."

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, I don't want to spend my last few minutes here talking about how Peter consumes his food."

"Uh-huh, because I get sick just watching it," James commented, closing his eyes and rubbing them.

Peter sniffed unhappily. "If you don't like what you see then don't watch!" He huffed, scratching chocolate fudge off his face and wincing as he scraped a blemish painfully. Peter was the shortest in the group, the chubbiest and had the worst case of acne the doctors ever seen. It was pitiful.

Remus glanced at him, his amusement faded and a stern look appeared.

"Peter, stop being childish." He demanded gently. "We're here to have a good time, not throw tantrums."

Sirius and James watched Peter's face redden and raised their eyebrows at Remus as if to say, "Now what?"

Remus sighed softly. "Padfoot, divide up the new stamps, I'll be back in a minute." he said, pushing off the dresser in an awkward effort to stand. After smoothing out his tattered khaki pants, he walked out past Peter, leaving his three friends in the room.

Sirius shook his head. "Man, I'm going to miss it here." he stated. He eyed the walls, taking in the faded wallpaper and gazing around more.

"Yeah, it sucks that your parents are such crabs." James sighed, giving him a piteous look. His hair, like Sirius's, was untamed and broke combs going through it. However, unlike his best friend, James's hair was merely an extremely dark brown.

Sirius nodded. "At least I'm not off to live with the Malfoy's, like Regulus."

James looked at Sirius before grinning insanely. "Doesn't your brother have a _crush _on Lucius Malfoy?"

Sirius blinked once. Then twice, before scowling. "I would hope not! The Malfoy's are the most awful people in the area! Ah, well, at least he gets to stay here, though. I have to go all the way across the states to live with Aunt Lena and Uncle Bernard."

The room was silent for a few heartbeats. Sirius divided the stamps while Remus was gone, and jumped as the tawny haired teen hopped suddenly in the now empty carpet space. Staring up at his friend, he blinked at the wonky shaped package that was shoved in his face, completely confused.

"It's for you," Remus said softly with a surprisingly large but teary grin. "We saved up some money and got you a few things for the trip back. Don't open it now... open it when you arrive to your Aunt and Uncle's place."

Sirius took the offered item and stared at it, a small and appreciative smile gracing his lips.

"Thanks guys, this means a lot," He whispered. "But I don't have anything for you...."

"Don't worry about it," James said. "We're not going anywhere. We'll still be here when you come back."

Peter nodded. "Of course we will be. It's not like we have anyplace better to go."

"Except Remus." James said, grinning. "We all know he'll get accepted into the top colleges, as if there was any doubt about that."

Remus blushed slightly. "Let's get through high school before we start talking about college." He reminded softly.

Sirius laughed at his friend, tugging Remus's hair fondly. "Yeah, you guys, for all we know, Remus could go to college here instead of somewhere like Harvard."

Remus's flush deepened, and just as he was about to respond, Mrs. Potter stepped into the room. She smiled politely at Sirius.

"Sirius, hun, it's your _mother_." she sighed, handing him the cordless phone. The Potters and Blacks did not get along well at all, until Sirius and James. Surprisingly, even Sirius's family had a strange soft spot for the young man.

Sirius took the petite phone and held it to his ear, frowning sadly at his friends whom watched him eagerly. He listened to his mother's instructions and hung up, staring at the disconnected phone.

"My ride's here."

The room was silent, even as Mrs. Potter took the phone from Sirius. She hugged him tightly as he stood.

"I really would have taken you in, Sirius." She said, trying to comb her fingers through his mess of jetty hair. "Unfortunately your parents threatened to sue."

Sirius laughed quietly, almost bitterly. He leaned down he kissed her cheek softly, then gave each of his friends deliberate bear hugs.

"I'll see you guys eventually, try not to move, too." He said. They all gave a solemn nod, helping him gather his few things and giving him more hugs.

"We'll miss you, Sirius," Remus said, being the most emotional out of the bunch and crying silently. He held his shirt's sleeve to his face and dabbed his eyes, trying to stop the already shed tears. "Try to write, you know where we live and you have our numbers, too."

"Okay."

James frowned and punched Sirius in the shoulder, in what would have been a playful gesture were there not a frown. "You better come back some day, too, or I'll never forgive you." He said, his glasses sliding down his nose.

"You know I will."

Peter belched and shrugged sheepishly at Mrs. Potter but smiled weakly at Sirius. He did not have anything to say and that was fine, the belch was enough of a reminder of what he would miss out on with Peter around.

"Bye, all." Sirius mumbled, silently ambling out of the room, his friends following him to the front yard. They watched him cross the pavement towards the aqua blue pick-up truck, climbing in. His things were already placed securely in the back with a tarp over them. Climbing inside, he waved mutely to his friends. Bellatrix, his cousin, climbed in easily and starting the truck. She shot James, Remus and Peter dirty looks before taking off.

That was never a good sign.

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TBC.**

_Well, that was a quick and easy chapter. Of course, we'll be having Sirius return in the next chapter._

_More things will be explained as we go on, and yes, Sirius does have glasses in this. Why? Because we made him that way._


	2. Two

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo_  
**Rating: **R  
**Disclaimer: **_We do not own Harry Potter._  
**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.**_  
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Sirius pulled up in front of the Potter residence, and paused beside the curb. He was sitting in a brand new, black mustang. Not only did he have a new car, but he had changed so much over the eight years he was gone. He had struggled through his new life at the all-boys school and his hardship at home with his Aunt and Uncle and ever-wicked cousin, Bellatrix.

Unfortunately, she had destroyed his contact list but he was able to save the gifts and stamp collection. Those were his memories, his favorite past times as a child growing up in Gryffin Falls, he wasn't about to watch her burn them away with a Bic lighter.

Sirius was now a successful animator of two popular cartoons and was ready to take a break and move business to the nearest city to his old home. He couldn't wait to see his friends and their families after so long.

Stepping out of the vehicle, Sirius straightened his black and long-sleeved shirt nervously. He had on a nice pair of blue jeans and CAT boots, ready to rock n' roll.

He knocked on the door, taking his sunglasses off and hanging them off the collar of his shirt. Frowning crankily, Mr. Potter opened the door and stared at Sirius.

"We ain't buyin' nothing." He said, turning slowly to go inside.

Grinning, Sirius laughed.

"Well, I'm not selling anything either, pops." Sirius tilted his head innocently at the surprised stare. "It's me, Sirius Black. You remember me, right?"

"MARON!" He bellowed with a toothy grin, walking aside and using the door as support. He had shrank considerably over the years but still held himself with pride. Mr. Potter had short salt and pepper hair that completed the charactered look.

Sirius strided in afterwards, looking towards the stairs for James's mother. She stepped down the steps and into the room wearing one of her old scarlet bathrobes, Maron stopped and stared impolitely, her white hair curled loosely down her back and over her shoulders.

"Harold, who's this?" she questioned, putting her fingertips to her mouth. One of her habits when she was curious or surprised, Sirius's grin couldn't get wider.

"It's Sirius." Harold said pleasantly and Maron's eyes widened. She looked him up and down, taking in his adult figure before taking his face in her delicate hands and turning his face side to side, slowly.

"Oh, Sirius, it's been ages." She sighed brightly. "I'll go call James! You know he married that pretty Lily Evans? I couldn't have been happier!"

"No kidding?" Sirius smiled. "We'll, I'm going to guess that Bellatrix destroyed my invite, since I never got it." he grumbled.

Maron nodded. "I know he would have wanted you to be there," she said, grabbing the phone. "So, how long are you staying?"

Sirius grinned. "I'm moving back! It'll be interesting to see what's changed."

"Wonderful!" Maron giggled happily, dialing James's number. It took three times before she successfully got through.

"James, why don't you and Lily stop by? It's _very _important." She said, barely hiding her excitation. Harold and Sirius waited, listening to the hum of James's electronic voice. "_Now_, James. I mean it." she added and hung up.

She beamed at Sirius, tugging his arm and directing him into the living room. She brought out a glass of iced tea for Sirius and sat in her favorite armchair. Harold sat on the loveseat, putting his feet up on top of the olive green hassock.

"It's been what, eight years since you left?" Maron asked, leaning forward joyfully. She eyed him with motherly affection. "Oh, you've grown _so _much..."

Sirius smiled sheepishly, looking at his reflection in the beverage. Sirius told them about the all-boys high school he attended and the college as well. He explained his profession in the animation business briefly and shyly admitted he had no real relationship with anyone. He hadn't met anyone he was interested in, but that didn't mean he wasn't looking.

As he finished the mild synopsis of his life away from home, James and Lily entered the home and stepped into the living room. They glanced hesitantly at Sirius, wondering if he was the owner of the Mustang in the front. Gazing curiously at his parents, James looked back at Sirius.

"Um...?" He managed unintelligibly. Sirius grinned.

"Keep going James, you've almost got it." He teased, winking at Lily. "I've _just _heard you and Lily got married, sorry I couldn't make it to the wedding."

James blinked in realization.

"Sirius!" he breathed, staring at him. "I...damn you've changed. Where are your glasses?"

Sirius chuckled. "I bought contacts, but I have glasses too." Sirius studied James and then Lily. "You both seem pretty much the same to me, anything I should know about?

Lily shook her head. "No, no." she chirped. "We haven't gone anywhere important but college. I'm a journalist and James here is still in college to become a doctor."

Sirius nodded approvingly. "That's cool, I make cartoons for a living. I have a complete copy of the two series I made, I'll show them to you some time."

"This is so neat!" James vocalized enthusiastically, sitting down on the couch next to his father. "So, are you just visiting or are you moving back?"

Sirius cackled. "I'm here for good and not even my mother can get rid of me, _again_." he quipped.

The group of friends stared at one another, taking every bit of past information in.

"So where's Remus and Peter?" Sirius finally inquired, pushing his surprisingly long hair over his shoulder absent-mindedly. Lily gasped, ignoring the question and staring at his hair in awe.

"It's good to know you learned how to use a brush, Sirius!" She said. "I'm surprised it's, well, so long!"

His countenance glowed in mild embarrassment and pride. He touched his hair again, glancing up at James and Lily.

"I like it long, and my cousin buzzed my hair before the private school," Sirius sighed, running his fingers through his hair more before pushing it away. "I grew it out to spite her, but I admit I like it better long."

James nodded slowly. "I bet you looked stupid with your hair short, especially when it was growing out."

"James!" Lily and Maron exclaimed in horror, their eyes wide from his blunt rudeness.

Sirius nodded. "I would have worn a hat if it wasn't against the rules," he stated. "But, growing it out gave me a chance to experiment."

James gave him an odd look. "Experiment, how?"

Sirius shrugged. "The normal, pony tails, spikes, pig tails...to freak everyone out." He added at their looks. "I even had weird hair gels in various colors. Had some fun with that."

"If hats were against school rules, how did you get away with all of that?" Lily chuckled.

Sirius shook his head. "I didn't. I was always getting detention for, um, expressing myself. They had some of the dumbest rules you could ever imagine."

"Even worse then the ones your mother had?" James questioned, both eyebrows raised.

Sirius thought about that for a moment. "They had some of the dumbest rules you could ever imagine." he repeated before they both started laughing. Lily rolled her eyes in amusement while Maron giggled to herself. Harold had his eyes glued to the television set, ignoring them all.

"So, where's Remus and Peter?" Sirius asked again, returning to the subject once again.

"Well," Lily started. "Peter works as a car salesman downtown."

James gave a grunt of disdain before shrugging it off and answering the question about Remus Lupin.

"Remus is still in college. He's planning to be a psychologist." He said. "Works where the supermarket used to be. He restored it and made it a library. It's really quite nice, if you want to check it out."

Sirius nodded. "We can always go now. My stuff isn't due to come in for a few more hours, and it would be nice to see the town again."

"Alright, we'll head out and be back in time for dinner!" James smiled and stood.

Sirius laughed at his friend. "You sound like Peter." he jested.

James frowned at his friend, looking at Lily before sighing in defeat.

"Peter isn't part of our, um, social circle anymore." He explained awkwardly. "He's into bad stuff, bad business to be near him."

Lily nodded her agreement. "We had to distance ourselves from him, we couldn't help him and we couldn't let it bring us down."

Sirius nodded, upset even though he wasn't particularly fond of Peter. He had been a friend, and he hoped the best for him but apparently Peter had chosen his own destination to the dumps. "Sorry to bring that up." he said, getting up from the chair, mentioning towards the door. "Let's go! I'm driving!" he commanded with a light-hearted grin.

"Sirius, since you're going out, I'd like my son _and_ daughter-in-law returned in one piece." Maron said lightly.

Sirius laughed. "I'm a very good driver, I'll have you know." he said. "So they shall be returned in one piece, even if its in a body bag!"

"Ah, the price for riding in that beast of a car." James said, excitedly dragging his friend out the door. "Come on Lily."

Lily glanced at Maron. "Don't worry, if they get out of hand I'll use my pepper spray." They shared a secretive laugh and the red-headed woman left the house and closed the door. The car was already started and playing rock music quietly. She climbed over James and sat in between him and Sirius. Lily looked over the interior of the car and sighed with a smile. "I'll have to admit, Sirius, you have a nice car."

"Thanks, Andromeda paid for half of it, as a gift." He drove his way to the library, which was located on the corner of the small shopping center for Gryffin Falls. It had the usual convenience market, laundry matt, video store and dollar store. Even a nail and hair salon for the women's gossip. Down the road to the left some was a church and in the other direction was a tiny fishing pond. This town had everything a person wanted, in Sirius's biased opinion.

He parked in a spot towards the back of the parking lot, not willing to test his luck at getting dents and such. Sirius turned the ignition off and stepped out of the car, his friends climbing out afterwards. Lily and James turned to Sirius and smiled sheepishly.

"We're going to go into the video store, we're banned from the library...." Lily said, clearing her throat quietly, a blush spreading across her cheeks.

Sirius rose an eyebrow quizzically and turned his gaze to James, who shrugged.

"Lily and I ruined a couple books." he said. "It wasn't what you would call, um, pretty."

"Save it, I don't want to know." Sirius said, putting his hands up. "I'll go and check the library out myself."

"Well see you in a few!" James called, pulling Lily towards the video store.

Sirius didn't see a reason to respond. He walked into the brick building, the soft music playing throughout the giant room. Bookcases sat in there correct spots, labeled by number or author names. Smiling, Sirius went straight for his favorite authors, picking out Poe, Dickenson, Patterson, and a few others.

He carried the small stack of books to the check-out and read the fluorescent sign. It read; _"All books, for sale, see me for prices." _

"Why's everything for sale?" Sirius asked the young man behind the check-out desk. The librarian's face was beautiful, with orange-brown hair that curled around his ears and framed his face. Golden reading glasses were perched on the tip of his nose. He took in the person's outfit, noting the black zip-up vest and the white, button-up and collared shirt underneath of it. His pants seemed to be _painted _on and left _very _little to the imagination. Snapping out of his thoughts he looked at the man's face and grinned impishly.

"The library's closing, it'll be changed into something else." he said. "Will you be purchasing those?"

"Yeah." Sirius said, placing the books on the counter. He had collected a total of thirteen books, each of them around three dollars.

"Thirty-nine dollars, please." He said softly, smiling warmly. Sirius fished in his pocket and opened his wallet, plucking out two twenty dollar bills.

Taking the twenties, the man behind the counter put them into a bank bag and pulled out a one and handed it to him. He grabbed the stack of books and a large bag, putting them into the plastic bag then handed them back to Sirius. "Thank you and have a nice day!" he said with a delightful smile.

Smiling as well, Sirius took the bag, putting the dollar into his wallet then dropping it into his pocket. "You too." he said, walking towards the door. He stopped long enough to search one more time for Remus, but didn't find him. Sighing, he left and walked over to the video store, bag swaying next to him. he had been hoping to find Remus, but couldn't.

Once inside the video store, he found James and Lily in the back, looking at romance movies. Shaking his head, he went towards them and found Lily looking at the cover of "Gone With The Wind."

"Why are you looking back here, when you could be towards the front where the gore and action flicks are?" Sirius said, grinning impishly. James turned to him.

"Did you see Remus?" he asked, frowning once Sirius shook his head. "Ah, well that's too bad. Maybe some other time?"

"Of course, Remus couldn't keep me away from him even if he wanted to." Sirius exclaimed, feeling dramatic. "And I promised you all I'd be back, so here I am."

Lily clapped, not even looking at him, her eyes still attached to the films. "Bravo, Sirius, bravo."

Sirius bowed lightly, if only for his own amusement and then picked a video off the odd shelf. He handed it to Lily, and she read the back. Her eyes widened and narrowed, causing her to beat him with the DVD container.

"You." _Whack_. "Evil." _Smack_. "Pervert!" She yelled, drawing quite an amount of attention to herself. "You always were the worst, Sirius Black, always."

"Lily, you're giving everyone a show." Sirius murmured, his lips twitching in amusement.

Lily flushed, turning to see everyone staring at her. With one last glare, she threw the dirty movie at Sirius then made her way for the door.

James chuckled. "That was mean," he said, grabbing Gone With The Wind for Lily. "Now I'll have to smooth things over."

"...between the sheets!" Sirius added with a grin, returning the movie.

"Between the sheets." James confirmed, following Lily quickly towards Sirius's Mustang.

Cackling mischievously, Sirius unlocked the doors and let James sit in the middle for protection to, himself, the driver. He dropped them off with quick hugs, and a light slap from Lily, and made his way to the new home he purchased. Parking in the garage, Sirius locked up the car and garage before slipping in the house.

Gliding though the barren house, he flicked on the lights and was pleased at least _some _things worked. His things hadn't arrived, so he needed to find a way to entertain himself. Glancing at the bag, he sat leaning against the wall and pulled out one of the books and opened it to the first page. He relaxed there reading until he was tired and stopped, deciding it would be best for him to get a hotel for the night, and contact the movers in the morning. He locked up his little house and got in the car, driving towards the nearest bed and breakfast.

**.  
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TBC.**


	3. Three

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo  
_**Rating: **R  
**Disclaimer: **_We do not own Harry Potter.  
_**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.  
**_**Note: **_Anonymous reviews are now excepted._

Sirius stirred in his bed quietly, light flooding into the window as the phone rang. It was his wake-up call, and he realized that it was, indeed, nine o' clock. Reaching over, he picked up the telephone. 

"H'lo?" He mumbled sleepily, already pushing his feet out of his bed. He knew he would have to call the movers soon, and possibly ask James to help him unpack. He also had to give his friends, and even Peter, the gifts he ordered in return for the package they sent away with him. Peter had given him a collection of stamps he never saw before, beautiful places around the world. He wondered briefly where Peter had gotten them but figured he wouldn't ask. Leave the mystery. James had given him a photo album that showcased various embarassing photos. He loved them, he showed everyone that he cared about. Remus had given him something small and delicate but also fierce. The silver necklace that held a brilliant shark tooth for display. It meant a lot to Sirius, since it once was Remus's favorite belonging. He wore it as often as possible. "I'm up."

Sirius hung up, stood and padded towards the bathroom, his vision blurry. He nearly ran into the table, causing himself to become only slightly more alert. Grumbling, he felt his way along the walls, eventually finding the bathroom. Turning on the florescent light, he shielded his eyes until they adjusted. Finally, he walked over to the bath tub and turned on the shower, fixing the temperature to his liking.

Stripping out of his boxers, which were the only things he usually slept in, he pulled back the curtain and stepped inside the ceramic tub. Luke warm water washed over his skin, slowly wakening his sleep-dulled senses. Grabbing the shampoo presented by the hotel, he emptied the contents onto his head. Running the gooey liquid throughout his hair, he lathered it up, collecting all of his hair and cleaning it.

Stepping back under the stream of water, all the dirt and grim, from the day and night before, was washed down the drain with the bubbly shampoo. Sirius didn't bother with the conditioner. All it ever seemed to do was make his hair greasy and stringy looking. He didn't like that. He used the offered soap to wash his body, muscles tensing and relaxing under the pressure of his hands. When he was completely cleaned off, he ceased the faucet's water and grabbed the towel, wrapping it around his waist before stepping out onto the carpet presented there. His hair dripped down his abdomen, disappearing into the plush towel along with other droplets that were compelled by the power of gravity.

Sirius made his way back into the bedroom, removing the towel from his waist and placing it onto the comforter. He reluctantly changed into the clothes from yesterday, chagrined that the movers were a day late with his belongings. He straightened his shirt and jeans out, using the towel to dry his hair, gently. He combed his fingers through the damp, raven locks, not at all concerned about a brush. One bad hair day wouldn't harm anybody. Sirius figured his hair was long enough not to stick in too many odd directions, so he left it at that.

He rolled the sleeves up to his elbows, pleased that it somehow looked like a different shirt. After the final appraisal, Sirius picked up his wallet and keys. He left the room as it was, knowing that a misplaced towel and a messy bed wouldn't perturb the cleaning staff.

Sirius closed the door, taking the stairs to the lobby and quickly paying the fee for the night. He walked out of the building, straight for his car. As he was about to unlock the door, he noticed a thin and silver-white mark leading from the door to the end of the car.

"Somebody keyed my car!" He exclaimed angrily. Scowling, he unlocked his door and got in, slamming the door shut in the process. He knew that wouldn't help the situation, or his car, but he couldn't help but feel childishly mad. Someone keyed his precious, very expensive toy, and he didn't know who it was.

Sirius turned on his _baby _and pulled out of the parking lot at top speed, still peeved over the damage to his car. He was already thinking of the new paint job, and the cost. He growled, increasing the gas as he headed to the other side of town. He needed clothes incase the movers wouldn't be there, and needed food as well.

The other side of town consisted mostly of food and clothing stores. There were Asian markets, Mexican restaurants, Italian foods stores, and then your normal grocery store. The clothing was one big department store or a sears, neither of which Sirius minded. He just needed a place to get new clothes.

Parking his vehicle and running his finger over the scratch, Sirius sighed irritably and made his way into the clothing shop. Shopping wasn't his idea of fun, but it was a necessity. He decided on four shirts and three pairs of slacks, paying for them after he was done. Putting the bags behind his seat, he looked over at the food store and lost interest. Clothes were enough for now, maybe he could pester Lily into cooking for him or something. Maybe.

Sirius sat back in his car, closing the door with self control this time and deciding to stop at the library. He missed Remus yesterday, so he figured he could try one more time. If he happened to miss Remus again, he'd have James drag him out. Banned, or not.

The ride was of the speed limit, his anger temporarily subsided until he got the future cost of the paint repair. He knew that was going to be a bitch, and he wasn't looking forward to it.

Saving his car from further damage, he kept his mustang towards the far end of the parkinglot and walked to the library. It was empty, he realized. No more books, desks. Nothing.

"Aww, man." Sirius muttered, making his way back to the car. He realized he didn't have James's number, and would have to pester Harold and Maron Potter. First, the movers, though. Definitely had a bone to pick with the movers.

Sirius went back to his car and drove to the hotel. He shut off his precious vehicle and went into the room. He had a few hours until check out, which gave him plenty of time to call the movers and rip off a few heads if needed. And it was needed.

Once in the room, he grabbed his wallet and fished out the business card with the cell number to the driver. He took the phone and dialed the number, then redialed it when he realized he forgot to put the needed digit in front of it so it would dial.

"Hello?" came the gruff voice of the truck driver.

"Hello, this is Sirius Black, and I'd like to know where my things are," Sirius stated. He listened to the sound of the radio in the background and the laughter of more than one person. He realized that the man wasn't in the truck. "Where are you?"

"Lunch break."

Sirius rolled his eyes at the concise and worthless answer. "Alright, then how _far _are you?"

The phone was still for a moment, the driver having a conversation with one of the other movers. "Three hours away."

"Three hours?" Sirius repeated, his jaw twitching. "_Splended_, well, hurry up."

He hung the phone up, scowling. Three hours. He supposed he could stop by the Potter's home and ask for James's number. Possibly Remus's as well. He'd also ask to see if his friends would be willing to help him unpack.

Pulling the car in front of the house, he locked it and glanced at James's car that was already there. Shaking his head, Sirius walked up to the door and knocked gently. Harold came to the door, and let Sirius in, toothy grin on his face. The long haired man couldn't help but laugh at the elderly man as he walked into the house.

"I saw James' car, why is he here?" Sirius asked.

"Maron asked him to come mow the lawn." Harold stated, shaking his head. "He can never say no when she asks him to do something like that."

Both of Sirius's eyebrows went up. "Quite the mama's boy, isn't he?"

Harold cackled in amusment, not denying it and hobbling towards the kitchen. Sirius followed, after closing the door politely. He looked around the house again, getting a better look of the place and musing over all the years he missed.

"Would you like something to drink?" Maron asked jovially, startling the black haired man from his thoughts.

He grinned. "That'd be nice, thanks."

Sirius sat in a chair at the table, delighted that they were the same from when he was younger. The house hadn't changed much. New wall paper, a computer addition in the living room. Even a plasma television was hanging in the kitchen, no doubt for Maron in the morning while she sipped at her coffee to wake up. The only exception to drinks in the livingroom were for guests, otherwise Maron and Harold both kept their food and beverages in the kitchen and dining room. She handed him a small glass of rasberry and pineapple juice. Interesting combination, but not unpleasant.

His gaze moved from the kitchen to outdoors, where Sirius caught sight of his friend pushing a lawn mower across the moderately sized yard. James was wearing faded denim pants, his white shirt clinging to him from the sweat. By the looks of it, he had been working hard for a while and mowing wasn't the only chore the man was put to do.

He grinning slightly, amused but observing his friend's backside. The jeans were fit nicely to James's mild curves, showing muscle Sirius realized he shouldn't be thinking about.

"What is wrong with me?" Sirius muttered under his breath, causing Maron's attention to drift to him.

"What's that, Sirius?" Her hands were covered with soap sudds, the wash cloth dangling from her dainty grip above the sink.

"Nothing!" He said, grinning sheepishly at her while his mind twirled the thought of James's jean-clad bum around. "God..." he murmured, putting his head down.

"HAROLD! Sirius's sick, get the thermometer!" Maron screaked, washing her hands quickly to tend to the blue eyed man. His head shot up from the table quickly, his eyes wide.

"What? No! I'm fine, just...thinking." He cleared his throat, a small blush spreading over his cheeks. Maron looked at him, her eyes narrowed in inspection.

"Are you sure, you look flushed."

Sirius nodded, putting a smile on his face. "I'm positive, it's nothing," he stated. Maron eyed him skeptically, then shrugged, returning to the dishes. Resting his head back on the table, he tried to think of something to detour his mind from James. He drifted back to all the times he watched Peter eat, and shuddered, picking something that wasn't so disgusting.

"Mother, I'm done with the lawn." James stated, walking back into the house. The white shirt he was wearing might as well not have been there, as it left nothing to the imagination. He noticed Sirius at the table, and grinned. "Good morning, Sirius!"

Sirius looked up from the table, and bit his lip to keep any strange sounds from leaving his lips. "Morning, James...." he muttered, banging his head against the table.

James stared at Sirius in bewildered silence, surprised to see his friend acting the way he was.

"Er..." He vocalized cluelessly, glancing from his mother to his father whom just entered the kitchen with the glass thermometer. James blinked. "Sirius's sick? Then why is he banging his head like that?"

Sirius glanced at James and quickly averted his eyes to Harold. "Really, I'm fine." The older man ignored his statement and obtrusively thrusted the mercury filled wand into his mouth. He stared at the man, getting a taunting wink in return.

"Traitor." Sirius mumbled around the glass tube, hardly missing Maron's reproving stare.

"Don't talk, Sirius!" She hissed, her tone motherly but not at all angry. It was more...worried.

He sighed through his nose, staring up at James. Begging for mercy. James sniggered. Sirius glared at James as Maron removed the thermometer. "Well, his temperature is normal." She stated.

"I said I was fine." Sirius retorted.

Maron nodded. "I know, but you were flushed, and banging your head on the table wasn't helping with reassuring us any."

James chuckled, sitting down next to his friend. "Mom, this is Sirius we're speaking of." He joked.

Maron nodded. "I know, but I was hoping he grew out of that phase."

"Hello! Sitting right here!" Sirius stated. The three of them glanced at each other before laughing hysterically. Maron was the first to calm down, and looked at James and Sirius. She was glad to see the two of them together again, and laughing.

"_Anyways_!" Sirius drawled, taking on a faux haughty tone. "Can you write down yours and Remus's number? I still need to see Remus!"

James snickered one more time, pulling a spare notebook from a random drawer. The pen following. Sirius watched as his friend wrote down their names and numbers. Even internet connections, which Sirius appreciated.

"Thanks." He said, taking the paper. He gazed down at the writing and raised both eyebrows. "Translate."

James's brows furrowed in surprise and confusion. "What?"

Sirius frowned. "What's that?" James leaned over and supplied an answer. Apparently in his opinion the scribble was an eight. "Okay...and this one?"

James glared at him, statching the paper rudely and rewriting the passages on the paper. He shoved the paper back at Sirius and was annoyed when his friend asked what something else was.

"Can't you read english?" he grumbled bluntly. Sighing, he tossed the pen at Sirius and repeated the numbers.

"Sorry, James, but you have horrible..._writing_." Sirius laughed. "Now that I think about it, you've always had chicken scratch."

James grinned. "That's why I'd make a great doctor!" he stated.

Sirius rolled his eyes then chuckled. "Now that you _mention _it, you would make a great doctor. I can't read a real doctors handwriting either."

James glared at his friend. "My hand writing isn't that bad!"

Sirius held up the card and pointed to one of the numbers. "James, that looks like secret code for aliens."

"It's a four!!" James exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air.

Sirius shrugged. "If you say so." He stood up, finishing off the drink Maron handed him before and handing the empty dish to her. "Can I use your bathroom to change in? The movers didn't come with my stuff, so I bought some clothes to change into."

James nodded. "Get your stuff and change, then!"

Sirius gave him a bemused look, sauntering past his messy-haired friend and out to his car. He grabbed the bag and made his way quickly to the bathroom of the house.

Stripping from the soiled clothing, Sirius pulled on sinfully thin orange tank top that was a size too small. It clung to his skin comfortably soft, so he didn't change it. Next, a pair of dark blue jeans were slipped up his legs and buttoned snugly around his hips. The majority of the article was baggy, but comfortably so and that's what mattered most. The outfit, Sirius noted, looked decent and went marvelously with the shark tooth necklace. He fingered the piece of jewelry, smiling softly.

Sirius put his dirty clothes in the bag with the new, uncaring. He left the bathroom silently, entering the kitchen and placing the plastic bag onto the chair he was in earlier.

James turned to him, staring at the bright orange shirt and grinning. "Your nipples are showing through."

Sirius's eyebrows rose, his blue eyes trained on his friend in surprise. "Why, like that?" He made a move as if to touch them, and James punched him in the shoulder. Hard.

"Ow! What in the hell was that for?!" Sirius demanded, reaching up and rubbing his shoulder. James hit hard, considering he was pretty scrawny looking.

"Sirius! Watch your language!" Maron chided.

"Sorry, Mrs. Potter!" Sirius said, blushing sheepishly before punching James back. James retaliated painfully, and before they could start an all out wrestling match, Sirius put his hands up. "I'll take no further abuse from you, you...tosser! I'm going back to the hotel."

James grinned victoriously. "Alright, you whiner."

Sirius pouted, wiping away an invisibly shed tear. "Sticks and stones."

James shook his head. "At least you didn't say whips and chains." he muttered.

"What?!" Sirius exclaimed.

James sighed. "Just something Remus said once... don't ask."

Sirius blinked a few times. "I'll just go ask him." he muttered, grabbing his bag and leaving the house. "Later, James!"

"Bye, Sirius!" James called with a wave. Sirius got into his car and headed back to the hotel. It was a quick trip and he parked away from the rest of the cars and went to his room, intending to call Remus.

He closed the door, dropping the bag fecklessly and striding meaningfully towards the phone. He dug the card from his pocket, reading Remus number to himself and dialing it quickly. It rang three times before he heard the audible click of someone picking up. He held his breath excitedly, his heart hammering...and his world crashing in surprise as a woman answered.

"Hello?" Her voice inquired politely.

"Aah, hello." Sirius chewed on his lip, sighing softly. "Is Remus there?"

She giggled quietly. "Just a moment." And she was gone, the phone clattering gently on a table. Sirius sat still, blinking. Remus had a girlfriend? He knew he shouldn't have been surprised. Remus was intelligent and charming when he last saw him, no doubt more-so now.

"This is Remus." Came a beautiful voice from the other end, and Sirius had to swallow nervously.

"Missed you, _Puppy_." Sirius cooed teasingly. He had been the only one to call Remus "Puppy." His friend was playful, and during their friendly wrestling matches he'd whine and growl like a puppy. It was endearing, cute.

The silence on the other end stretched pregnantly. "...Sirius?"

**TBC.**


	4. Four

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo_  
**Rating: **R  
**Disclaimer: **_We do not own Harry Potter._  
**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.**_..

Sirius was sitting in the restaurant Remus told him to go to. Fidgeting in his seat, and barely concealing his eager excitement. He hadn't seen Remus in so long, and now here he was in a modernly stylish diner. Waiting for him.

Sirius was five minutes early, but didn't mind. He ordered a drink, not much of a breakfast type, looking around his surroundings quickly. Bored with sight-seeing the diner, he grabbed the miniature pen from the side of the table and scribbled on a napkin. Someone cleared their throat, and he averted his concentration to an elderly woman with graying hair. She sent a disapproving glare, and Sirius ignored her, he was perfectly content with his doodling.

Sirius glanced next to the woman, sighting the boy from the library at the entrance. The man looked his way, making a thoughtful frown before walking briskly towards him. Sirius paled slightly as the man made his way over. The last thing he would have suspected was that the man from the library was Remus.

Shaking his head, Sirius smiled as Remus sat across from him. He was dressed in casual wear, a pair of painted-on, faded blue jeans and a navy blue shirt clung to every curve of his body. The long haired man couldn't help but sneak glances at his long time friend. He never would have guessed that Remus would grow out of the overly baggy clothes and wear something more body forming. A _lot _more body forming.

"Well." Remus smiled. "It seems that we've met yesterday, but only as strangers."

Sirius laughed, blushing lightly. "Yeah. James told me you worked at the library, so I went... and I just didn't recognize you without your plaid."

He leaned against the table, intentionally putting his elbow on the table. The woman was sitting behind Remus in the next booth, sending glares at him every time he moved or even breathed too loud. Remus didn't say anything about his behavior, and that was fine.

"You've certainly changed, yourself, Siri." Remus said, swiping his golden brown hair behind his ear. He didn't have his glasses on, which made Sirius wonder if they were only for reading. "And you've learned how to use a brush."

"Funny, Lily said the same thing." Sirius grinned and chuckled. "And I see you've learned that there are other fashion statements besides plaid." He teased.

Remus shrugged. "So? What happen to those old broken glasses of yours?"

Sirius pointed to his left eye. "Contacts, greatest invention ever." He stated.

Remus laughed at his old friend. "So, why'd you come back here all of a sudden?"

"Well, I wanted to see the old gang again. That and I always liked it here, but now, not even my mother can get rid of me!" He said joyously and grinned.

Remus chuckled quietly, his golden eyes sparkling merrily. He leaned forward, so that both elbows rested on the table and smiled. "The way I see it, the only people in this town that wanted to get rid of you is your mother and father. Everyone else will great you with open arms."

"Speaking of open arms, get up." He said, standing. This earned a curious stare from Remus, but the librarian complied. Just as Remus stood up, Sirius gave him a tight hug. One hand was on the small of Remus's back, palm flat against the material covered area. And the other was curled gently behind Remus's neck, pulling him closer. "God, I missed you, Remus."

Remus returned the embrace gently, pressing his cheek against Sirius's shoulder and smiling softly. "I missed you too, Sirius." His ears were pink due to embarrassment from the curious glances they were getting. Remus didn't _hide _his sexuality, but he also didn't _flaunt _it.

Sirius pulled away and grinned, sitting back in his chair as Remus did the same. "So...what have you been up to for eight years?"

"Well, I went through high school, and now I'm in college working on getting my doctorate in psychology." Remus said, then added. "And before you ask, I started changing my look my junior year of high school. I guess everyone did."

Sirius nodded. "Understandable. I went through the same thing. Although, in an all boys school, it was kind of hard, since we had BS rules to follow, and we weren't allowed to leave the grounds without some kind of supervision." He couldn't help but roll his eyes. "It was so much easier to change once I went into college."

"What about yourself? Are you going to college?" Remus asked with genuine interest. He leaned back in the chair, crossing his legs under the table.

"I've gone to college and collected my graduate in the animation and illustration major." Sirius said, his pride showing tenderly. He waved a hand in the air gently. "I've made two moderately popular shows."

Remus blinked in surprise. "When did you figure out you wanted to be an artist?"

"About," Sirius looked thoughtful before beaming. "Freshman year? I never paid attention in class, and then I picked up a pencil and started drawing my classmates as cartoons."

Remus chuckled, shaking his head. "You never were one to pay attention in class." He commented fondly.

Sirius shrugged. "School was never my thing. I hated sitting in the classrooms and having to work on a schedule. This way, I get to work at my own pace, and I don't get a detention if something is late."

Remus laughed at his friend. "Doesn't your boss get mad at you?"

"Yeah, but it's not like he's going to fire me." Sirius stated. "Besides, I'm only late with something maybe three times a year."

Remus shrugged. "Most don't even like you to be late once."

"Then I got damn lucky." Sirius stated.

Remus declined the offer for a drink or meal, and Sirius took this as his cue to finish his beverage and pay for it. He smiled at Remus and ushered his friend through the door, ready to do something else with him. He had plenty of money at hand for something fun, and even a good credit card. Despite moving, he was still financially loose.

"Where do you want to go?" Sirius asked, looking his friend over one more time. He didn't feel as guilty about it as he had with James. As far as Sirius knew, Remus was single. Even if there was the possibility that the woman who answered the phone was his girlfriend...

Remus chewed on his lip, staring at Sirius before laughing. "I don't know."

Sirius shrugged, walking Remus towards his car. "Well, what is there to do here?"

"Well, there's the movies, but nothing good is playing. The park is full of little children playing. The library is closed. Other then that, I don't know what else there is to do." Remus stated.

"Well, we could always drive around until we find something to do." Sirius suggested. "Or we could just drive around the town and catch up on old times."

Sirius grinned suddenly, startling Remus. "What?" He asked.

"Who's car, yours or mine?" His eyes twinkled, hoping for Remus to choose _his _vehicle. He'd have to break the speed limit, just for him.

Remus hesitated, as if estimating his doom before smiling. "I guess I could ride in yours...."

"Great!"

**..TBC.**


	5. Five

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo  
_**Rating: **R  
**Disclaimer: **_We do not own Harry Potter.  
_**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.**_

* * *

Remus sat in Sirius car, head down between his legs, as his friend sped down the road. Rock music blared from the speakers, one of which was next to his head. The black haired man looked like he was enjoying himself, slowly increasing the pressure on the gas pedal.

"Sirius! Don't you think you should slow down?!" Remus yelled over the rock music.

"What?!" Sirius questioned, turning down the music. "What did you say?"

"I said, slow down!" Remus shouted.

Sirius stared at him for a soft moment, glancing back at the road and nodding. He decelerated, and left the music low for his friend. "Sorry, Rem, forgot you didn't have a death wish."

Remus looked at him, appalled. "A death wish?! Of course, I don't! Are you telling me that _you _do?!"

Sirius grinned, turning down his street sharply and causing Remus to grab onto the seat and door in panic. "Hardly."

"Then what do you call your atrocious driving?" The librarian grumbled, pressing his face against the glass and watching the houses go by at a, thankfully, slower pace.

"Having fun?" Sirius suggested hopefully.

Remus glared at him in reply. "That was not having fun, that was being reckless!" he stated. "I can't believe you'd be so careless with another human life in your car!"

"Oh, Remus, you were never in any danger." Sirius said with a chuckle. "Besides, I wasn't going a whole lot over the speed limit."

"How fast were you going?"

"I don't know, fifty-three...fifty-five."

"Sirius! The speed limit is thirty-five!"

Sirius blinked owlishly at him, pulling in front a yard and looking at him. "So, I accidentally mixed the numbers up... there's nothing wrong with an accident."

"Sure, this accident didn't cost us our lives." Remus grumbled. "Um...why'd you stop?"

"We're at my home." Sirius grinned, turning the car off and stepping out. Remus exited the car and looked in the direction of his friend's house.

"Well, at least you picked a nice home." Remus murmured. "How long will it be before you destroy it?"

Sirius gaped at him, his jaw hanging. He collected his wits from the accusatory insult and smiled. "Well, I don't know about destroying it, but I will make my own personal touches to it."

"You're going to ruin it, I feel for the house already." He drawled.

Sirius glared playfully at his old friend. "I am not going to ruin the house. I may knock out a wall or two, but I'm not going to destroy it."

Remus eyed him skeptically. "That is one thing I'll believe when I see." He stated.

Sirius stuck his tongue out at Remus immaturely. "You're so mean to me!" he cried with false hurt, sticking his bottom lip out in a pout. The tawny haired friend stared blatantly at the pouting mouth for a breath's worth longer than he should have, before smiling smally.

"If you say so, Sirius." said Remus, his tone still dubious. Sirius stared at him, licking his dry lips before shrugging and unlocking the door. Remus stepped in first, grinning at the poorly painted white walls. Apparently, as for most houses, the walls had to be painted a neutral color. The coat layers varied in size and texture.

"Aah, I see that they had pink before." He drawled in delight. "Somehow, I see you more as a violet person."

Sirius raised both eyebrows in challenge. "Of course," He countered. "I'd have to leave _you _with the pink, now wouldn't I?"

Remus blushed. "So, are you going to give me a tour?" he questioned. Attempting to change the subject.

Smiling, Sirius nodded, taking Remus' arm and pulling him further into the house. "Well, naturally, downstairs, you have the dining room, living room, and kitchen." He stated.

"Naturally." Remus agreed, allowing himself to be pulled by his friend.

The upstairs walls didn't look any better then the ones downstairs. In the master bedroom, faded orange could still be seen through the thin layer of white paint. The room Sirius was using for his studio had the most awful neon green paint radiating through the new layer white. Patched over holes and old crayon markings were also visible, most of which were random, mindless scribbles.

The last room was a faded red, which didn't look so bad through the white, so Remus and Sirius concluded that the person in the room was the only sane one. That was until the librarian saw the bars on the windows.

"Kinky." Remus commented conversationally, striding over to tug on the sturdy iron bars. He glanced at Sirius. "Are you going to keep them?" If Sirius didn't know any better, he would have sworn that Remus wanted the bars to stay.

"For my own personal brothel? You bet." Sirius smiled sweetly. "This room belonged to a child, they put the bars on the windows for the kid's safety. I came here for a tour before it was all cleared out, and if you think this is bad..." He left the sentence hanging. Remus nodded and followed him out of the room. Sirius showed him the bathroom next, and he sighed in relief.

"Finally, something nice in this house." He looked at the silver fixtures and the light gray and black tiles that lined the floors in a checker board pattern and the matching ceramic ones in the shower. The toilet was black and the sink was as well. "I like it, are you going to keep it?"

"Probably. I like it too, though I'll need help painting the house. Will you help? I don't want James to see it quite like this." said Sirius, sheepishly grinning. "He'll never let me live it down."

Remus raised an eyebrow, his mouth twitching in amusement. "Well, I don't see why not. Just as long as it's between now and the end of the month."

"Well, at least you know I can't ruin my house anymore than the family before me." Sirius said, thinking back to the earlier topic from before. "And you'll be here to help me, so I don't see what how I'll destroy the place. I'm making an improvement."

Sirius and Remus jumped, a loud shrill noise echoing through the house. It paused a moment before starting again. The sound grated their eardrums, playing over and over again.

"What the bloody hell is that?! It's awful!" Remus shrieked over the continuous noise. Sirius shook his head balefully.

"The doorbell." He shouted glumly, hurrying down the stairs and wrenching the door open. He smiled slightly at the man, of whom he believed was one of the movers, and turned to rip the doorbell case open. It wasn't an easy task, but the plastic gave way and shattered, causing Sirius to use the plastic to sever some of the wires.

"Talk about 'The House of Doom.'" Remus griped under his breath, stepping up behind Sirius.

"I'm going to assume it belonged to the Addam's Family." Sirius stated, moving aside as the movers made their way in with boxes. Walking out the door, Sirius made his way over to the truck driver. "Excuse me, but mind telling me what took you so long?" he demanded, more then asked.

Shrugging the truck driver pulled out his clip board. "I said it would be three hours." He grumbled.

"Yes, but you were supposed to be here yesterday!" Sirius countered, lowering at the man. Remus followed, watching Sirius's temper rise with the the sluggish replies. He sighed, already determined to keep out of it.

"Look, pal." The driver started with a slur. "Just let us do our job and then you can pay us and we'll be on our way."

Sirius growled. "I have half a mind _not _to pay you, but fine, get off your ass and do something." He turned around, blinking adorably at Remus. He smiled. "Don't look so put out, Remmy, it doesn't suit you."

Remus shook his head. "Anger problems, Sirius?" He cocked his head to the side, but released a small grin.

Sirius beamed. "Not always! I went to classes for it!" he joked. "But the teacher was so boring that I pretended to get 'better' at controlling my anger just so I could leave."

Remus shook his head, laughing softly. "Unfortunately, you can't push them down the stairs, off a building, or shove them out into oncoming traffic, otherwise you'd have to unload the truck by yourself."

"That's not true, I'd get you and James to help." Sirius stated.

"That would work... up until you had to tell James why the truck showed up but there is no one to unload it." Remus countered. "Then he'd be too busy laughing."

Sirius glared playfully at his friend. "I hate you." He stated. "But I could say that they had to attend a meeting, though I won't tell him that it's with their grave."

"You can't hate me." Remus rolled his eyes, then sarcastically said, "And I'm sure you'd do that. James may act daft, but he's really not. _Now_, shall we stay here, or go and bug James?"

"But James'll see the house!" Sirius complained, his voice high and girlish. Remus snorted.

"Of course, he's meant to, remember?" He reminded the ebony haired man. Sirius bounced from foot to foot, shaking his head frantically.

"No, no, no, no, NO!" He whined, his eyebrows scrunched in faux worry. "He'll see the _paint _and then he'd see the bars. Remus, I can't let him see the _bars_!"

Remus grinned lopsidedly at the silly and cute antics of his friend. He had never pictured the other man to act in such a childish manner. Even when they were younger, Sirius's tantrums never quite reached this limit. It was hug and kiss worthy, in his hormonal opinion.

"Alright, I'll call James, you sit and fret about it." Remus said, then realized he didn't have a phone and the car was left in the restaurant's parking lot. "Okay... maybe not." He sighed, and Sirius's tantrum ceased and a wicked smile laced his face.

"I win." He cackled.

Remus rolled his eyes again. "Yeah, yeah, get over yourself." He said. "You aren't that great."

Sirius grinned from ear to ear. "But, of course, I am! Why else would I have the house with iron bars?"

Remus eyed his friend. "Because you're slightly psychotic?"

"Only according to shrinks with nothing better to do but study me." Sirius chirped.

Remus decided to save his thoughts on the possibility of him being able to study Sirius in certain ways. He simply smiled. "So, apparently I have something better than to study you?"

Sirius blinked at him, looked mildly thoughtful before shrugging. "I guess..." he murmured. "But how could you not want to study me? I mean... look at this body."

Remus watched Sirius trail his palms down the sinful fabric of his chest and had to look away. Unfortunately it was into Sirius's face and he blushed. "You're not that great, Sirius."

"How many times are you going to tell me that?" The taller man sulked. Is he not gay? Sirius thought, covertly pouting. He hadn't noted the blush.

After a few hours of waiting, everything was finally in the house, and Sirius signed the papers for the movers to leave. Sirius and Remus went through the house, getting lost in the maze of boxes. At the moment, they were just looking for clothes, and dishware. Everything else could be dealt with later, maybe after the rooms were painted. The bed had already been assembled in the master bedroom, and his drawing equipment had been put into the proper room.

"Hey, Sirius! I think I found your clothes!" Remus called to the other man from the other side of the room.

"Great! Where are you in the room?" Sirius questioned. He was sifting through a pile of unlabeled boxes, knowing that the bathroom accessories would be in them.

Remus looked around and chuckled nervously. "I'm not quite sure."

"Um." Sirius called, before grinning stupidly. "What color are the walls?"

He could hear Remus's peels of laughter. "I didn't think of that! Um... orange?"

Sirius left the living room and trudged lazily up the stairs and to the master bedroom. His grinned marched back onto his face at the sight of Remus sitting on the floor, a box wide open in front of him. Remus had used the pen, that he "borrowed" from the movers and had _unfortunately _(Sirius snorted mentally.) never returned, to open the boxes and had managed to find two boxes of clothes.

"Why, yes, they would be clothes." Sirius purred in amusement. He leant against the door frame, his orange shirt riding up his side. "Now all we have to do look for the dishware."

Remus groaned quietly, almost whimpering. "Spare me, Sirius, it was hard enough finding your bloody clothes." Though even as he 'complained', a few more hours with Sirius wearing that shirt was something he considered worth it.

**TBC.**


	6. Six

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo  
_**Rating:** R  
**Disclaimer:** _We do not own Harry Potter.  
_**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.**_

* * *

Sirius rolled over in his bed, cringing from the detectable light in the room. Normally, his bedroom would be the darkest of black, but unfortunately he hadn't been able to remodel it. Yet. It was currently a fluorescent orange that defined the light and made the area brighter.

Groaning, Sirius squinted at the clock, that was salvaged from a particularly tricky box, and sighed. It was nine o'clock, he supposed that he could get up and arrange his boxes and get the room ready for painting. The first would _have _to be the living room. The pink had to go, permanently.

After putting his glasses on, Sirius dragged himself out of his bed, and without bothering to dress quite yet, padded into the living room to survey the mounds of boxes. He would have Remus help him with the living room and the spare room. (With the bars.) James could help with everywhere else in the home, just as long as the pink and bars were out of his limits.

Sirius shifted a large box, centering it in the living room and placing others onto. He wanted everything in the living room's mid point so that the walls were accessible. The rug could be ruined with paint, it was filthy already and was a putrid brown.

After 45 minutes, Sirius had most of the boxes in the middle of the room. Some of the packages wouldn't fit, so they had to be dragged into another room, some having to go upstairs. That in itself was a chore Sirius never wanted to repeat. The first few boxes got stuck on the corners, and a few of them fell back down the stairs. After a bout of swearing at them, and a silent prayer that nothing was damaged, all were upstairs in the rooms so he could paint the living room.

Sighing, Sirius trekked back up the stairs and headed into his bedroom. Grabbing a few clothes from the boxes, then headed into the master bathroom. He decided against the shower, opting to take one that night to wash the paint off instead. Placing his glasses on the sink top, adorning on the faucet, the dark haired man turned on the hot water. Cupping his hands together, he filled his palms with the liquid and splashed his face. He repeated this process, eventually adding soap, washing his face, then rising it off.

Next came the hair. The night before, after Remus had left, Sirius emptied his car of everything that went with him, hairbrush included. Taking his hair out of the hair tie, Sirius dampened the brush bristles before running it through his hair. It didn't take long before it was completely detangled. Pulling his hair back again, Sirius quickly braided it before moving onto his clothes.

He dressed efficiently in a pair of blue jeans that could afford the inevitable paintjob and a white shirt that he had around since boarding school. He put on a pair of socks and sneakers, his glasses too, feeling as though he were dressed for battle with the room of hell. The _pink _room.

Sirius bounded into his room and grabbed his keys, ready to get his paint supplies. He made a mental checklist, knowing that he would need plastic to cover the boxes and furniture and also the rollers and paint brushes. Boy, was that going to put another dent in his budget.

Getting in his car, he made his way through town and towards the hardware store. He reluctantly parked towards the front and locked up. Walking into the store, he gawked at the size of the building.

"It didn't look this big when I was outside." Sirius commented lightly to himself. He adjusted his silver rimmed glasses and read a few signs as he neared them. Eventually, he found the paint isle and sighed in agony. There were various different colors of paint, and it made him wonder how long it would take him to find regular _white_.

After five minutes of searching, Sirius decided it was time to ask someone. Looking around, he found no one stocking the shelves with more paint. Sighing, he sauntered towards the customer service counter, hoping they would be of some form of help. The only person there was a lady in her early twenties. Sirius figured that she was working to pay for college.

"Excuse me," Sirius called, walking up to the counter, "but I was wondering if you could help me."

Smiling, she nodded. "Sure thing, what do you need?"

"Well, I need some white paint, but there is so much paint down that isle, that I don't know where to start." Sirius stated.

With her smile widening, she flipped her blonde hair over her shoulder and walked out from behind the service desk. "Follow me." She said, and swayed past him gracefully. Sirius followed, completely set to the mission of finding the figurative needle in the haystack.

Stopping, she picked up and bucket and handed it to him. "Eggshell white."

Taking the can, Sirius inspected the label and sighed. "I walked past this loads of times."

Giggling, she clasped her hands in front of her, successfully drawing Sirius's attention to her cleavage that was raised from the action. He blinked, averting his attention.

The employee moved closer to Sirius. "So, is there anything else you need?" she asked with a coy smile.

"Nothing really." Sirius stated. "Thank you for the help."

Nodding, she inched closer to him once again. "When you're ready, just come back to the desk and I'll check you out." He said, walking away with a light sway over her hips.

Shaking his head, Sirius picked up one more can of white and then noticed with dismay that he would need her help again. "Um, Miss?" She twisted around, blinking at him.

"Yes?" She chirped in a tone that seemed even more happily than it should have. Sirius was unphased as he glanced around. Becky, was her name, he read from the tag.

"I need pure black... see, I'm painting my bedroom that." He explained, putting the white cans down to get back to later.

"You're bedroom?" Becky inquired, positively delighted at the mention of the most personal area in a person's home. Especially when the said man was _this _delicious looking.

"Yes. I just moved in, and it's a hideous shade of orange." Sirius murmured.

Becky shook her head with a giggle. "That's so awful!" She stated with a smile.

Sirius nodded in agreement, discretely rolling his eyes. "I know it is, now, can you please show me where some black paint is?"

Nodding, Becky grabbed Sirius' arm and pulled him a little ways down the isle. Stopping him, she pointed a few shelves above them. "That's where the best black paint is. Everyone uses it."

Sirius nodded. "Thank you for your help." He said, reaching up to grab a few cans of the paint. She watched his body stretch up as he retrieved two cans of paint. Sirius looked at her, his glasses sliding down his nose. He smiled forcefully, silently pondering whether this trip would turn completely disastrous.

"Um," Becky started shyly, fluttering her eyelashes. "Will you... go out with me?"

Sirius blinked in shock, almost dropping the cans of paint. "E-excuse me?"

Frowning, she blinked her blue eyes owlishly at him, narrowing them. "Is there something wrong?" her tone was dangerous.

"No." Sirius drawled cautiously, wondering if she suffered from bipolar episodes. He was also curious about whether or not she would whip out a gun from her brassiere and kill him on the spot. Yikes.

"Is there something wrong with me?" She whined, gripping her chest. "Are my boobs not big enough?!"

"It's not that!" Sirius pleaded, backing away.

"THEN WHAT IS IT?!?" She screamed, drawing attention.

"I'm gay." he cried softly, completely alarmed. His eyes were enlarged, but nothing compared to the way her baby blue ones. It seemed almost comical.

"YOU'RE GAY?!?!" She wailed. "IT WAS MY FAULT, WASN'T IT?!" Sirius made to protest, but she rounded a furious glare on him. "I ALWAYS SEEM TO TURN MEN GAY!!!"

"With the way you're acting now, you're not making me love the idea of being straight." Sirius muttered under his breath. She heard him, bursting into dramatic tears.

"WHHHHYYYYY!?!?! FIRST MY BROTHER AND NOW YOUUUU!!"

Sirius's head snapped up from staring at the floor. "Brother?" His eyes widened and he grabbed the four cans of paint, awkwardly making his get away to the check out. The thought of incest ran through his head and he was glad he hadn't eaten yet. He hoped the poor woman got some help. Soon.

Heading towards the check out, Sirius was stopped by a man who couldn't have been much older then himself. "Hello, Sir, would you like some help?" He asked.

Sirius eyed him skeptically. "Maybe, but I have one question. Are you in any way psychotic and overly-dramatic?" He asked serious.

The employee, whose name tag read Robert, blinked a few times then chuckled. "I see you've met Becky." He commented.

Sirius nodded. "I have, and never again do I want to."

Robert laughed again. "Understandable. So, would you like some help?"

Sirius nodded. "I still need rollers and tins." He put the paint tins down, his joints aching from the stress they were put through. Robert moved them aside for later purchase.

"Follow me, then." Robert ordered lightly, leading the way up the isle next to the paint, where Becky was still making a scene. Sirius shook his head. That girl had some real problems. "Alright, how many rollers do you need?" Robert asked.

"Huh? Oh, three will be fine, and three goggles and tins as well." Sirius answered.

Robert nodded, grabbing what Sirius asked for. "Is that all for you?" Sirius nodded. "Alright, follow me and I'll check you out. Not to say that I need a reason to do that." Robert stated, walking past a dumbstruck Sirius.

Following Robert, Sirius felt a wave nausea come along. Was this store cursed? Surely that had to be the reason that an incestuous and mentally ill woman hit on him, not to mention a decently handsome man that Sirius had no true interest in.

At the checkout, Sirius retrieved and placed the cans onto the conveyor belt with the other items. He dug into his pant's pocket and plucked out his credit card, handing it to Robert. Soon, all the items were purchased and, with Robert's help, brought to his car. ("Cool wheels." Roberts commented in awe.)

Sitting in his Mustang, Sirius rested his forehead on the steering wheel. He groaned loudly, vowing to never return there alone. Never in his life, had he wanted to be invisible until now.

Minutes later, he ended up safe and sound in the driveway of his house. He brought the paint supplies into the house and stacked the white cans carefully in the living room, with the rollers and tins, while he dropped the black cans off in his room for later.

Knowing that he needed to call Remus and James, he would have to ask one of his neighbors to use their phone. Smiling, he stretched. This was one way to get to know his neighbors. Sort of?

Sirius left his house, walking across his yard and into the non-fenced yard. He knocked on the door, and smiled at the man who answered.

"What?" He snapped. Sirius blinked.

"I, ah... may I use your phone? I need to-" With that, the door slammed in his face, leaving him temporarily flabbergasted. "Thank you, anyways." Sirius turned, rolling his eyes and knowing that he wouldn't try that again. So, onto his other neighbors.

Sirius went past his own house to the one next door. Two cars sat out front, so he figured it was a married couple. He had hoped a nice elderly lady would answer, so he could use the phone. Even if it was a elderly lady, he just hoped the people were nice, and not psychotic.

A shudder ran down his spine as he thought about the horror from the store. Shaking his head, Sirius pushed the image from his mind as he walked up and knocked on the door. A loud crash came from inside, and Sirius blinked. Maybe this was a bad idea.

He was about to leave and a girl with red hair opened the door, a fake smile on her face. "Yes, can I help you?" she asked.

"Um...hello, I'm Sirius Black. I just moved in next door, and I was wondering if I could use your phone." He said.

The girl nodded. "Come on in." She said, opening the door, and letting him in. "I'm Deidre." She introduced herself.

"Dee!" Came another feminine voice, clearly oblivious to Sirius's presence. "Where'd you throw my bra?!"

Sirius blanched slightly. Deidre answered, unphased. "I don't know! Under the bed, in the bathroom, the corner of the room?"

"Found it!"

A young woman came into the room, her blouse open and revealing her entire front side. Thankfully, Sirius thought, the brassiere and skirt kept her decent. She blinked at Sirius, a blush rising up her cheeks as she closed her shirt in embarrassment. "Deidre! Why didn't you tell me we had company!" she hissed, swiping her chin-length hair behind her ear before storming into the kitchen. She appeared just as mortified as Sirius felt.

Deidre turned to Sirius, a scowl gracing her features as she noticed that Sirius didn't remove his attention from where her lover went.

Deidre glared at Sirius. "Are you staring at my girlfriend?!" She demanded.

Sirius tore is attention from where the other woman had left into the kitchen. "What?! NO! I wasn't! I don't even like girls! So, um...about your phone...."

"It's in the living room!" came the voice from the other woman. Nodding, Sirius went into the living room, from the entrance hall, to call Remus. He dialed the number, sighing miserably.  
  
"What a day..." He muttered, just as the phone picked up.

"Sirius?" Chirped the amused voice.

"Ah? Hey... are you free today?" He said, shivering at the feel of the woman's icy glare. Remus's line was silent before Remus answered affirmatively. "Great, wear something you don't mind getting dirty."

"Okay." And with that, Remus and Sirius hung up. He turned around, blinking at the wrathful twitch Deidre gave him.

"YOU USED MY PHONE TO CALL YOUR BOYFRIEND FOR SEX?!" She hollered.

"He has a boyfriend?" The semi-streaker asked, returning to the room in a more acceptable appearance. "Wow. Oh, I'm Michelle." She smiled.

"Nice to meet you... and no, he's not my boyfriend. He's my _friend_, and he's coming over to help paint my house." Sirius explained, mentally choosing to keep the peace with his lesbian neighbors. He didn't want to be murdered in his sleep, and the chances of making either of the women crying, like Becky, were thankfully slim. He was the one whom would probably be tortured to tears.

Grinning impishly, he moved around a couch to keep the distance between him and Deidre and walked to the door. Michelle waved cheerfully, all smiles, whilst her lover crossed her arms and waited for him to leave.

Sirius opened the door, leaving with a forced smile before closing the door and sprinting across the lawn and to the safety of his home. He opened the door, went inside and collapsed onto the floor and leaned against the door. "I hope today gets better." He groaned.

The door vibrated with a knock, and he stood up slowly. Nervously peeking out the peephole, he grinned once he spotted Remus and opened it. "I'm _so _glad it's you."

Remus looked confused, though _very _good in his baggy plaid shirt and torn jeans. "Why, who did you think it was?"

"Would you believe me if I said I thought it was one of my crazy lesbian neighbors?"

Remus looked curious, but nodded after thought. He grinned widely. "Yes, Sirius, I think I would. Would you happen to be talking about Michelle and Deidre?"

"...Yeah, how did you know?" Sirius blinked.

"Oh, because any guy that goes near Michelle is threatened to painful castration by Dee." He said fondly. "I didn't, I guess it's because I'm... ah... so! We're painting?"

"Yeah, painting." Sirius murmured, wondering what Remus was truly about to say.

**TBC.**

_::cackles:: Didn't you just **love **his neighbors? _


	7. Seven

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo  
_**Rating: **R  
**Disclaimer: **_We do not own Harry Potter.  
_**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.**_

* * *

Sirius sat on the floor, rummaging through the bags from the hardware store. He was currently in search of the plastic coverings that would protect everything from the paint. Remus was looking through some of the other bags, and was unable to find the plastic covering. The long haired man finally came to a conclusion, and it wasn't one he liked.

"We have to go to the hardware store." Sirius stated. "I forgot to buy plastic coverings."

"How could you forget the covers?" Remus questioned.

"Well....when I got there, I couldn't find the colors I was looking for, so I had someone help me, and she turned out to be a real psycho. So then I had someone else help me, but he just hit on me, so I was thinking more about getting the hell out of the store then anything else." Sirius explained, getting off the floor.

Remus cocked his head to the side innocently, his eyes quizzical. "You were attacked by a psycho and then hit on by a guy?"

"Pretty much." Sirius pouted, grabbing his keys. "Can you come with me?"

The lithe man seemed hesitant to respond, but couldn't decline. Sirius had obviously perfected the puppy look and it was tempting his hormones. Boy, would he give anything to jump Sirius right then and there. "...Fine, just," he bit his lip. "Keep to the speed limit?"

"Don't worry, it's not like I'm in any _hurry _of getting there." He said.

The two of them left the house and got into Sirius's car. The drive, Remus noticed with relief, was much more slow and calm than it was the other day. They arrived at the hardware store, and with a loud, mournful sigh, Sirius heaved himself out of the car.

"It won't kill you, Sirius." Remus rolled his eyes.

"You don't know that!" Sirius stated. "It nearly killed me last time! That chick scared me! Then I had to go home and deal with some grumpy old man and two psychotic lesbians!"

Remus stared at Sirius. "I'm telling Dee you called Michelle psychotic."

Sirius eyes widened in fear. "Please, don't. She'd kill me in my sleep."

Remus snorted in amusement and walked around the car, grabbing his arm. Tugging somewhat forcefully, he managed to get Sirius across the parkinglot and into the entrance of the building. He glanced around quickly.

"Alright, show me the isle for paint supplies." Remus demanded, not letting go of Sirius's arm. It seemed to relax and comfort the poor, _scared _man. He mentally sniggered.

Sirius lead Remus to the isle where Robert had taken him earlier. They strided side by side down the row, searching carefully for the large plastic sheets.

"Ow." Remus muttered, looking at the paint brush that was on the ground. It had hit him in the back of the neck.

Sirius frowned. "That's odd, the paint brushes are in the other isle... only the rollers are in this one."

The two men directed their attention to the woman from earlier in Sirius's day. She had gathered an armful of paintbrushes, at least over a dozen, and was glaring angrily at Remus. Sirius raised both eyebrows, catching the malicious grumbling Becky was saying. "Evil twerp... steals my men... fag."

Sirius shook his head, moving closer to Remus. "You're so popular." He joked.

Remus rolled his eyes. "Let's just not even get into that conversation." He muttered.

"She's the psycho I was talking about. She scares me." Sirius stated conversationally. "She started screaming about how she turns men gay, and brought up her brother. I was seriously frightened."

"Sirius, she won't kill you." Remus stated with a smile.

"How do you know? She's already made an attempt on your life!" Sirius countered.

"With a paintbrush." Remus added.

"Whatever, lets hurry up and find what we came here for, before she remembers where the more dangerous tools are." Sirius hissed playfully, grabbing Remus's wrist and rushing away from Becky. Remus was torn between amusment with Sirius and frustration over Becky. Once again, he was pegged in the back with a paintbrush.

"WHORE!" Becky screamed. Remus grit his teeth, and Sirius was still determined to find what they were looking for. "Unnatural bitch!"

Remus's nerves were wearing down, and when Sirius stopped and grabbed a package of plastic covers, he was hit again with another brush.

That was enough. Remus had enough. Turning on his heels, the auburn haired man stalked towards the blonde who still held a few paintbrushes. Removing his glasses from his face, Remus placed them on his head as he glared at the woman in front of him.

"Look, I don't know what in the hell your problem is, but continue being a stupid bitch and beaming me with those, and I'll use them to paint you on the wall." He threatened, his arms flailing effeminately.

Becky glared back at Remus. "You're such a whore. You always steal my men and you broke my brother's heart!"

"Only in your mind!" Remus countered. "What makes you so damn sure that we're together?" he questioned, pointing to Sirius. "He's my friend. Get that through your stupid blonde head."

"Your friend?" She spat with disbelief. "THEN WHY ARE YOU TWO HANGING ALL OVER EACHOTHER?!"

"We aren't hanging over each other." Remus countered in exasperation. "We're here to get something he forgot. We're painting his house, what else would we be here for?"

"TO FLAUNT YOUR F-FREAKISHNESS!"

Sirius walked up behind Remus, making a piteous attempt to gain his friend's attention. "Remus?"

"Just a minute, Sirius," Remus said in false sweetness, waving him off.

"Okay." Sirius sighed, standing behind him, waiting for the other man to finish his argument. He couldn't believe how much Remus acted like a woman.

Becky glared at Remus. "You're a freak, a _fag_!" she shouted.

"Like I haven't heard that before," Remus grumbled. "You're nothing more then a preteen slut with nothing better to do the strut around town banging every guy that you see." He stated. Turning, he grabbed Sirius' arm and dragged him towards the check out lines.

"Wow, Remus, I never expected you to throw such a tantrum, you argue like a girl." Sirius teased, putting his forehead against Remus's temple to lighten the joke.

"It wasn't a _tantrum_, but I do find it very vexing that no matter where I go... she's there and screaming at me." He stroked Sirius's hair with one hand, handing the package to the cashier with the other. "You know you're on her hit-list now, right?"

"Great, not only do I have to worry about castration in my sleep... but I have to worry about psychos trying to shag me while I'm trying to catch Z's or take a shower."

Remus chuckled, dismayed when Sirius pulled back. "Well then, I suppose we'll have to stop at a lock shop some other time, hm?"

"Yep!" Sirius chirped. They took the purchased item and walked back into the parking lot. Sirius unlocked the car, shoved the box of coverings into the back and climbed in.

Remus rolled his eyes, pulling the seatbelt on and securing it. "You know, your cousin made you paranoid." He stated.

"Of course she did! I haven't even told you anything that she's done to me!" Sirius said. "She put her fucking snake in my bed while I was sleeping!"

Remus stared at his friend. "Sirius, no matter how much she hates you, she'd never do that."

Sirius fixed Remus with a level glare. "Look, Puppy, she did and she gave me a damn buzz cut, too!"

"Somehow, I can't picture you with a buzz cut." Remus murmured thoughtfully, relaxed as Sirius pulled the car out of the parking lot. "You've always had long hair, it's just not knotted and tangled now like it was before."

"Yeah, I learned how to take care of my hair." He sighed. "After I was nearly bald, I quickly learned not to take it for granted. Besides, Bella, the bitch, hates my hair."

"Why? It's lovely."

"That's why." Sirius glanced at him, frowning. "She doesn't like anything to do with me. I mean, she literally burned my list of phone numbers and addresses. Not only that, but she had my contacts restricted to family while I was at school."

"Well...." Remus murmured, not entirely sure where to go with that. At least he knew why Sirius didn't write or call.

Sirius grinned as they pulled up to his house. Looking around quickly, he shut off the car and stepped out. Still finding no sign of his neighbors, he walked up to his house with Remus. They still had a few things they could do before they could paint the house, but after those chores were done, the pink was gone.

After they were in the house, Remus and Sirius set out to cover everything on the bottom floor in plastic. The long haired man prayed, to whatever ultimate force there was, that he had enough plastic. He looked over at his friend, who was helping him cover the tower of boxes in plastic.

"Hey, Remus, what was up with that chick back at the hardware store? What does she have against you?"

"Um, I hired her brother at the library and we became really close... friends." Remus said, shifting the plastic some. "We began working there more and more because after years of living here, there isn't much else one can do for entertainment. He and I enjoyed books greatly, so we read and talked a lot. She was convinced there was some sort of relationship between us, even though he was dating another man at the library."

"Oh..." Murmured Sirius, thoughtfully. "And what's up with the library? It's closed now, right? What's happening?"

Remus smiled mysteriously. "I'm changing it and opening something new. Kenneth left, so why keep the library? Not everyone goes there and it's quite hard to support with college."

"What're you changing it into?" He inquired, peeking around the boxes at Remus.

Remus grinned. "Secret!"

"Oh, sure, keep the secret. I'm only you're friend, after all." Sirius jested, taking the paint tins and filling one for Remus and the other for himself. "You get that side and I'll take this side?"

"Sounds alright to me." said Remus, unpacking the roller, tossing it's small cover aside. He unwrapped the goggles and put them over his glasses.

The two started painting the walls white, going over the same spot a few times for good measure. As they painted in silence, Sirius thought about what the library could possibly be changed into. A hobby shop, maybe? No, that was too obvious, and he would have advertised, Sirius thought, glancing at his friend. Could Remus be turning it into that? He always wished there was one in town. Well, as long as it was fun, he wouldn't mind. Remus may have changed, but he can still do fun, right?

"Oh, c'mon! You can't even give me a hint?!" Sirius questioned, and Remus started laughing.

"No, of course not! Where would the fun be in that?"

Sirius sighed. "I'll make you regret not telling me." He said in a serious tone. Remus looked at him curiously, blinking as white splattered along the front of his shirt and across his goggles. He smudged some of the pain off his goggles and looked at his shirt.

"...you got paint on my shirt." He said childishly, Sirius cackled. "I liked this shirt."

Remus rolled the tool in the paint and flicked it at him, leaving an awkward white slash down Sirius's side. Sirius raised his eyebrows in surprise, dipping his hand into paint and patting it lightly on Remus's face. It made a squeak sound when he pulled his palm away and he grinned.

Remus pushed Sirius away, causing the black haired man to trip. Remus dipped his hand into the pain and smeared it all over the other man's face and goggles. "Careful, Sirius, I'm armed with paint and it's extremely dangerous for your hair."

Sirius glared playfully at his friend. "That's it, Rem... You're asking for it." He stated, standing and grabbing the bucket of paint next to him.

Remus raised an eyebrow, a grin on his face. "You wouldn't do it." He stated.

"Wouldn't I?" Sirius stated, lunging the canister forward. A quarter of the paint left in the bucket escaped, splashing along the front of Remus' outfit, covering him and the ground below him in eggshell white.

"If you waist too much, you'll have to face the wrath of Becky again." Remus said, staring at the mess. "And I won't come with you this time."

"I have another can, I can always spill the rest of this one on you." Sirius cooed, stepping closer in threat.

"I refuse to surrender!" Remus squeaked, moving around the boxes to get away from his friend. "And I _absolutely _refuse to reveal the secret!"

Sirius raced around the boxes, content with just teasing his friend for now. He stopped, blinking as Remus stood facing him, smirking. He didn't like that smirk, that was the kind of smirk he, Sirius, used for devious purposes.

Remus reached forward, pushing the can at Sirius, and grinning once the paint spilled over the taller man's shirt. "You look horrible in white, Sirius."

"You think so too?" Sirius murmured, pulling his shirt up in mock critique. "I prefer cool colors, but oranges and reds are nice too."

Remus rolled his eyes, putting the remaining amount of paint in the tins. A knock sounded on the door, and Sirius blinked. "I'm not expecting anyone...."

"It's probably James. I called him before I left." Said Remus, moving over to the door and opening it.

"Traitor." Sirius hissed from behind him. "We still didn't cover the pink!"

James peered in the house with interest before taking in the sight of his best friends. "So." He smiled. "Should I come back later? You two seem sort of busy."

**TBC.**

_We apologize for the next chapters. Both of us have different online hours due to different time zones, so the next chapters will take a while._


	8. Eight

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo  
_**Rating: R  
****Disclaimer: **_We do not own Harry Potter.  
_**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.**_

* * *

Sirius sat on the floor with his legs crossed, gazing up at James with mild irritation. He was currently being beset by the messy haired doctor, over the color of the room, while Remus mearly sat back and watched without bothering to conceal his amusement.

"You know, Sirius, pink speaks wonders for you." James said, his eyebrows wagging suggestively. Sirius was struck with the thought of when he was checking out his friend's backside, and nearly slapped himself and then James.

"I prefer violet, thank you." Sirius said sweetly, his mouth pressed together in a firm smile of annoyance.

James's eyebrows rose. "Oh? Why's that?"

"Add an 'n' between the 'e' and the 't' and you get violent... and if you keep pestering me, that's how my mood's going to end up being." Sirius grumbled, picking himself up off of the ground and stirring the trays some. "So are you going to help paint, or not?"

"That depends," James commented, "are we painting the walls, or each other?"

Sirius smirked, putting down the stirring stick and lifting the tray. "I think it'll end up being a little of both," he stated, turning and slashing the tray of paint towards James. Some of the white liquid landed on both Remus and James.

James and Remus glared at Sirius, who was wearing a grin that stretched from ear to ear. They stood there for a few minutes before they began laughing, the room filling with the happy sound. After simmering down, James finally replied.

"Alright, I'll help paint." James said, unpacking a pair of goggles and placing them on his head and over his glasses. Remus assembled his roller for him and he took it politely from his friend with a small thank you. Sirius pried open the newest can of paint and poured it in the remaining tin before placing it nearest to the hallway where the walls faded from poorly concealed pink to a mangy brown. James sniggered quietly, dipping his roller in paint. "Did you get the chance to meet these people, Sirius?"

"Unfortunately." He murmured, not offering any more than that. Each of them set off to a section of the room.

"Did you ask who picked their color scheme?" Remus questioned.

Sirius shook his head. "I didn't, but I got the idea that they had bad eyesight, so I guess hot pink looked good to them."

James laughed, shaking his head. "Well, Remus, what's your opinion? How did it look too to them?"

Glaring, Remus flicked his roller towards James, getting paint on the would-be doctor. "My eyesight isn't bad enough that I would choose this color."

"I thought you liked pink." James said, pouting.

"I do, just not... this pink." Remus grumbled, sending him a lethal look. James caught it and winked, leaving Sirius clueless over the exchange.

Sirius went back to rolling the white on, thinking over how much he missed. He pondered over the hidden secrets he had slip through the cracks and drain away from him. Peter, the young man who was once his friend turned social delinquent. James and Lily, married and him without being there to see them. Finally, there was Remus... the person he adored and yearned for the most was now a stranger. Friends, but strangers.

"Are you alright Sirius? You're staring at the wall and.. not painting." Stated James, adjusting his shirt. It was a dusty gray, streaked with white and blotched with pale fingerprints. In Sirius's opinion, the cut looked good on him, but the material reeked extreme pallor from being washed over and over. He had a sneaking suspicion that it was from high school.

Sirius turned to look at him, looking faintly pensive. "I'm thinking about the past."

James nodded. "Ah, yes, the past. Filled with lockers, test, and stamp collections."

Remus chuckled softly. "Do you still have your stamp collection?" he asked Sirius.

Sirius nodded. "Of course, do you guys?"

"Of course we do!" James said. "Like I would get rid of that."

Remus nodded. "It was one of the few things we still had that linked us to you, and we weren't going to get rid of them," he explained. "Well, some of us didn't."

Sirius stared at his friends for a moment. "Peter got rid of his?"

James nodded. "How else do you think he'd have the money to buy a car lot?"

Sirius thought about that for a moment. "You know, I did order gifts for you three but if I give him his, he's just going to sell it, huh?"

"Yeah." Remus answered gently, shaking his head. "You should just send it back, or keep it...."

James's eyebrows rose with interest. "Wait, did you say three of us... as in you got us all gifts? Why?"

"Because," Sirius said, pausing as if it would explain it all. "I wanted to, and it was an apology for not contacting you. You guys were the reminders of where a bothersome guy like me belongs." He grinned.

Remus laughed. "You're not all that bothersome."

"Yeah, you have your finer parts, too." James finished.

"And what finer parts would those be?" Sirius smirked. "I don't think I've shown you them."

James glared playfully at Sirius. "Pervert, I'm telling on you!"

"Who are you going to tell? You're mother?" Sirius asked.

"No, I'll tell Lily, then she'll beat you with another DVD case," James stated.

"Only if she does it in the movie store again." Sirius laughed softly.

James laughed as well. "Do you know how long she ranted about that?"

"I'd guess around a couple of hours," Sirius said.

"What are you two talking about?" Remus asked.

Sirius turned to him, explaining his so-called brilliant actions at the video store. Of how he handed Lily a romantic pornography and afterwards he also pointed out to James that he _had _met Remus, only he didn't recognize him. "Should have came in with me," he chirped. "I don't think Remus would have cared if you came in just to tell him that I was home again."

James shrugged. "Still, it worked out, didn't it?"

"Yeah, but it would have been nicer for me to know sooner." Remus pouted. I was checking out my old friend's _package_! he sulked quietly to himself.

James stuck his tongue out at Remus and shrugged again. "Get over it, Moony." He scoffed. "It's not like the two of you got into a huge argument because Sirius was noisy or something, so everything is fine. Unless... there's something you're not sharing with us," James suggested, wiggling his eyebrows.

Blushing furiously, Remus threw the paint brush at James as hard as he could. "James Potter, you are and forever will be a pervert." He stated.

"Don't forget that he'll always be a git!" Sirius added with a grin. He silently pondered over the possibility of a secret love affair with Remus, but there was always the nagging thought of the woman who answered the phone that day. Sirius blinked. "Hey Remmy, who was the woman that answered your phone?"

Remus raised an eyebrow, his earlier frustration with James completely vanished. "What woman?"

"The first day I called you, a woman answered the phone. Unless of course you were playing the part of a very convincing telephone transvestite..."

"OH! No! I would never." Remus huffed. "That was Veronica Shears, my neighbor. She was taking care of my cats."

Sirius stared and then wrinkled his nose in disgust. "Puppy, Moony... PUPPY! YOU have CATS?"

Remus sniffed indignantly. "Two of them, yes! What's wrong with cats?"

"What's WRONG with cats!?" Sirius repeated. "Well, since you asked so nicely, I'll tell you. They smell, cough up hairballs all over the place, can't tell where their litter box is, and they always have to be near you! You get no privacy with a cat around! Let alone TWO of the damn furry things!" he explained, hand movement and all.

Remus stared at Sirius, small grin of amusement on his face. "And I supposed you're going to tell me dogs are better?"

Sirius nodded. "Of course they are! Dogs want their independence!"

Remus sighed and cleared his throat. "One, dogs leave bigger messes then cats when you don't put them outside in time. Two, there are dogs who have to be around you 24/7, and whine when you aren't around. Three, I happen to like cats."

"Fine, but I warn you... I'm getting a dog and he's going to eat your ratty furballs." Sirius sulked. Well, considering he liked everything else about the other man, Sirius couldn't help but feel relieved that liking cats was his only fault, thus far. "It's going to be a big, mean rotty, just you watch."

"I'd like to see you try." Remus countered, he took his paint brush from James and mixed his slowly drying paint. The room was already mostly finished. "My cats would double-team your mutt and put the smack down on it."

Sirius stared in shock, James doing the same. "Remus! Never have I heard my sweet innocent puppy use such WORDS! You make me proud." Sirius exclaimed, enthused.

Remus stared at Sirius, shook his head, and laughed. "It's one of the few times you will." He stated.

James nodded. "I've only heard him swear when he's been pissed off to the breaking point. But never in a casual conversation!"

Sirius shook his head, laughing, "Remus, you naughty boy! Someone should wash your mouth out with soap for that!" he teased.

"You'd like seeing that, wouldn't you? Of course, you're the first to be poisoned by soap."

Sirius pouted, again, and turned away feigning sadness. "That hurts, Remmy."

Remus raised an eyebrow, and while knowing Sirius was only kidding, he couldn't help but feel somewhat guilty. "Sorry?"

"Okay, you're forgiven." Sirius grinned over his shoulder, finishing up a small portion and surveying the room. "Is it finished?"

They were quiet as they put the finishing touches on the walls. Finally satisfied, they washed up in the kitchen. James used his cell phone and each pitched in for two large pizzas and a bottle of Sprite.

James left the house for better reception on his phone, leaving Sirius and Remus in the kitchen.

The long haired man was kind of sad that their paint fight was cut short, and grabbed the spray nozzle from the sink. "Hey, Remus, I think you missed a spot," he lied, reaching behind him to turn the water on.

"I did?" Remus questioned. "Where?"

Sirius grinned. "Right there!" he said, spraying Remus in the face with the water. Remus spluttered in surprise, backing up some and raising his arms to block his face. He waited for the spray of water to cease before peeking over his arms and blinking wide amber eyes at his grinning friend.

"You know, Sirius, I think that was very cruel. Not only was I covered in paint because of you, I'm now completely soaked... how do you think that's supposed to make me feel?" He snapped, only pretending to be mad. Sirius bought it, his invisible puppy ears sagging. Remus smiled, smoothing his friend's silky hair, taking the hose from him and spraying it in Sirius's face, causing the other man to step back and slip, coughing in surprise. "Oh, I'm sorry!" He pouted, kneeling next to Sirius, his brows furrowed in concern. "I didn't know you'd choke on the water!" He inched closer, practically in Sirius's lap.

James walked in, raising an eyebrow at the situation. "Want me to come back?"

Remus jumped, banging his head on the counter and groaning. "I'm just drowning and banging up everyone today, keep your distance."

James quirked and eyebrow, then shook his head. "Right.... The pizza will be here in thirty, so I'm going to head into the living room, and pretend I didn't see you playing nurse to Sirius," he teased, leaving the kitchen.

Remus glared at his retreating form. "You only wish this was you, James!" he shouted, getting off the floor and helping Sirius up.

"Somehow, I doubt that," Sirius grumbled. "You look small, but you weigh a lot," he teased.

Remus stared at him, gaping slightly. "Are you saying I'm a closet fatty?"

"A what?"

"A closet fatty! Someone who has to hide their weight through different means of clothing!" Remus sniffled.

Sirius snorted, tugging on his shirt, though with the position he was in, it looked suggestive. He landed on his ass, legs apart with Remus kneeling between them and tugging on his shirt was just the most perfect gesture of; "Come hither."

"With those clothes, Remus, I doubt you could hide fat under those clothes. I can't even _imagine _you hiding an _ounce _of fat under the clothes you wore the other day." He gave a low whistle, winking. "Second skin, anyone?"

Remus blushed a deep red. "Had I known you were coming home, I never would have worn that, because now you'll never let me live it down," he muttered.

Sirius grinned. "Sure, I will! The next time you wear something like that, I'll forget the time in the library."

Remus scowled. "Whoever said I would wear something like that again? I might just throw out that portion of my wardrobe!"

Raising his eyebrow in disbelief, Sirius merely stared. Remus met his gaze, averting his attention first. "_Okay_, so that would be over half of my clothes...."

Sirius laughed musically, letting Remus back away and standing up first and slipping on the water, landing on his arse again, banging his own head this time, making a sound thump. "FUCK!"

"Are you okay?!" Remus reached over, nursing his head. "Well, it's not bleeding."

"It hurts, though." Sirius didn't sound bitter, just amused and in mild pain.

"Why, may I ask, are you so... amused?"

"Well, it's because you're such a mother hen."

"I am not." Remus protested.

"Are too."

James walked in, watching them bicker. "What was the noise? The thump, I mean."

Sirius shook his head. "That was just Remus wounding my pride," he said, pretending to sob.

"Oh, good job, Remus!" James said, leaving the kitchen again.

"What do you mean good job!?" Sirius shouted, walking out after James.

"Exactly what it sounds like! Now, if we could do something about your ego, we'd be set," James joked.

Sirius glared with a pout. "You are so hurtful, James Potter."

"At least it's only that." James sang back, causing Remus to blanc.

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?" Sirius whined.

"He doesn't mean anything by it, Siri." Remus said, picking himself up carefully, watching Sirius crawl closer and stand when he was out of the small puddles.

"I'm not sure I believe that, I see how you all are! All hiding shit from me, well guess what! I'm going to find out." Sirius babbled. "And when I do, you two are going to pay."

"Pay for what, exactly?"

Sirius paused, looking surprisingly pensive. "I don't know, but you'll see!"

Remus shook his head at the stupid and thoughtless threat, starting to chuckle. He walked into the living room, pulling the soaked shirt away from his chest. "You know, Remus, you could always just take it off," Sirius joked, sitting on his couch in his wet clothes.

Remus blushed again. "Sirius, you're such a pervert," he stated, ringing the cloth between his hands, draining off any water.

Sirius grinned. "I love you, too, Puppy!" he said, tossing a couch pillow at him.

"Are you making up for years of childish moments?" James asked. "First the paint, then the water, now pillows. What's next?"

"Why, feel left out?" Remus murmured, staring at his soaked shirt with dismay.

"You know, Remus, I have a shirt you can probably change into if you want... maybe. I'd have to check." Sirius said, staring at his friend chest and stomach. The shirt was clinging to him again, sticking perfectly against his body and Sirius held his breath when Remus made even the slightest movements.

"You know, Sirius, you seem kind of... dazed." James murmurs quietly, only for Sirius to hear, startling the black haired man.

"What?" Sirius blinked large blue eyes at him, having not quite heard what the messy haired doctor said.

James rolled his eyes. "Can you make it any more obvious that you were staring at Remus?"

"He hasn't noticed yet, so yes, I could," Sirius muttered, blushing softly.

James shook his head. "You're about as dense as he is," he stated.

"What?" Sirius asked, blinking in confusion.

"Nothing," James said, grinning slightly.

Sirius glowered at him, but didn't pry. That was a first.

"Pizza's here!" Remus said, and James stranded Sirius in the middle of the living room to pay for the delivery.

They settled the pizza on the floor, away from the walls and other paint containers, camping around the pizza box. James handed out the paper plates and cups they were nice enough to give, letting Remus and Sirius serve themselves first, grabbing his own slice.

"So, what room's next?" James asked, causing Remus and Sirius to look at each other, their pizza in mid air and inches from their mouth.

"Um..."

**TBC.**


	9. Nine

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo  
_**Rating: **R  
**Disclaimer: **_We do not own Harry Potter.  
_**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.**_

* * *

Sirius leaned against his bed, finally finished with unpacking major items of his bedroom. This was all he needed, everything else could be unloaded with time. The next room was his art room. The whole purpose of moving was to meet up with his friends, but his job still remained. He was in the position of having to make a new animation show, for children or adults. He chose adults. Why not?

He adjusted the boxes for his own convenience, the two largest being in the hallway along with three or four small and moderately sized ones. He pieced together his art table, centering it by the window and pulling the chair over, checking the height. Nodding to himself, Sirius swirled around and picked up a random box, finding paper and pens. He placed that aside, opening another one, finding other objects, mostly tools. Triangles, t-squares, French curves... etc.

"I am never, ever moving again. Ever." He griped to himself, pulling his small plastic organizers closer, stacking their boxed drawers on top of one another, four on each side of the desk. He placed away the paper, pens and tools, leaving the t-square on the desk. He'd hang it up later.

This went on for almost two hours, without a break, and by the time Sirius was finished, he sagged in his chair and stared at the room.

"Finally...." He sighed, grabbing paper from his drawers and doodling briefly on them, pushing the page aside and taking a fresh sheet. He sketched James in a cartoonish way, still staying realistic. It was more based on anime than western works, but seemed appropriate with what he created.

He finished James, grinning lazily at the image of his friend on paper. Sirius sharpened his pencil, starting on Lily and eventually on Remus and himself. Once a picture of the three of them was done, he moved onto a new piece pf paper. He started off drawing himself, James, and Lily. Slowly, background was sketched in, then darkened over with each pass of the pencil.

One picture turned to two, then two to four, four two ten. Eventually, instead of drawing his friends, Sirius was making a storyline to the new show he was to put out. He couldn't think of anything better then the relationship between him and his friends. There was comedy, drama, action, and a little romance on the side. It had the makings for the prefect story, Sirius thought. He just wasn't sure how it would finished, there were a lot of open endings to chose from.

He set aside the freshly drawn pictures, grabbing another scrap of paper and sketching two people. He was more focused on the lines than on the actual look of the entire piece. Soft scratching noises on the paper were the only thing that produced life to his otherwise quiet home. He finished the face of one of the characters, added clothes, wrinkles and creases. Soon after was he finished, and he stared at the completed picture. It was Remus, and _surprisingly_, himself. They were pressed together at the hip, intimately. His character's arm around Remus's waist while Remus's sketch had his head rested on his shoulder, his hand on his chest lightly.

"Oh." He muttered, scratching his neck with a bemused expression. He already knew he fancied Remus, there was no doubt about it, but to put it into story form... that, he never considered. Until now, that is. _I wonder if Remus would mind? _He pondered quietly.

A soft knock sounded on his door, and he stood carefully to walk downstairs. He opened it slowly, peeking out before smiling warmly at the sight of his neighbor. "Michelle, hello. Can I help you?"

Michelle grinned. "I was wondering if you had sugar and milk. My car had to be taken to the shop today, and Dee's at work, so I can't get any."

Sirius laughed quietly, silently thinking: _Thank the lord her girlfriend isn't here, I'm still convinced she'll castrate me._

"Sorry, I don't think I have any." He paused. "Would you like me to drive you to the store? It's not like it's very far."

Michelle thought silently over the offer, thoughtful expression present across her features. "Well... I don't know, I mean, I don't want to be a burden," she stated.

Sirius shook his head. "It's no problem, I wasn't doing anything important anyway," he said, his mind drifting back to the picture he drew of Remus and himself.

Again, Michelle grinned. "Well, if you're sure! I'll go get some money, be back in five!" she declared, then ran off towards her house.

Laughing softly, Sirius shut the door, and went to turn off all the lights in the house. In his room, he grabbed his car keys and a thin windbreaker. By the time he stepped outdoors, Michelle came bouncing over with a pair of sneakers on, instead of the slippers from before. She had a blue denim jacket over her baggy orange sweater, wearing faded green sweatpants. Tacky, he liked the outfit. Sirius chuckled and locked up, leading her to his car.

"Oh, wow!" She ducked down and looked around the car before opening the door when Sirius unlocked it. "Compared to my tin box on wheels, this is awesome!"

Sirius beamed at her and started the car. "It was a gift, nifty, huh?"

He put the car in reverse and eased into the street, shifting the gears and driving down to the end of his block. Sirius turned down a road and caught sight of Michelle reaching for the radio. Sirius eyed Michelle, ready to change the station back should he need to. He didn't like when other people would pick the radio station. Last time he let someone pick, he spent half an hour listening to annoying boys bands.

"What is this!?" Sirius asked, staring down at the radio after Michelle changed the station.

Grinning, Michelle started dancing in her seat. "It's Dragostea din Tei, by O-zone!" she stated.

After listening for a few moments, Sirius started bouncing in his seat as well. "This song is catchy."

She giggled, bopping her head back and forth, causing her light brown hair to bounce around her head. "It drives Deidre nuts, at times, and she's the one that showed me the song..."

"Really?" Sirius blinked.

"Uh-huh, I play it too much." She admitted, reaching over to turn it up. Sirius turned it down and she frowned before turning it up again. He turned it down again.

"Please, don't, I get distracted when I have loud music." He said, causing her to murmur a sheepish apology. He pulled into the parking lot, turning the music down more. "Are you just going to run in? Or do you want me to come with you?"

Michelle shrugged. "If you'd like, you can come in. We'll make an adventure out of it!" she stated.

Sirius blinked twice. "What adventure can you have in the super-market?"

Michelle shrugged. "Deidre and I always do something different, because its so boring in there."

"I'm afraid to ask, but what kind of adventure can you make out of getting two small items?" Sirius inquired. He shut off his car, not exactly willing to go into the store. "If it's about your relationship, no offence, but I'd really rather not know. I'm not against it, or anything, it's just I was quite serious when I said I liked men instead."

"Oh, we only do stuff like that at times..." She giggled.

Sirius blinked a few times. "So, what do you do?" he questioned.

Michelle shrugged. "Shopping kart bumper cars, chicken football, just about anything we can get away with." She said, walking towards the entrance with Sirius. "Have you ever done stuff like that?"

Sirius shook his head. "I've never had someone to do that with, but it sounds like fun to me."

"So, you'll participate?" She chirped brightly. They stepped through the doors, heading straight for the sugar first.

"As long as I don't make a mess of myself before we get into the car, then I guess so."

"Great." She said, picking up a plastic broom most stores sell for cheap, screwing off the brushes and handing one of the long handles to Sirius. "En guardé."

Sirius took the pink broom stick, holding it up with both eyebrows raised. Michelle did the same with an orange broom, turning to face Sirius in a fighting pose. "We're going to sword fight with broom handles?" he asked.

Michelle nodded. "It's fun! Last time, Dee and I nearly took out three shelf stockers!" she stated happily.

"What did they do to you?" Sirius asked.

"...they said we couldn't have sword fights with broom handles." Michelle grumbled, swinging first when Sirius laughed. He blocked the swing and pushed it aside, poking her in the stomach with the broom handle.

"Well, then! I guess it's fortunate I'm here, because they haven't said I couldn't do it!" He ran off in one direction, Michelle chasing after him. If they were both straight, than they could be considered flirting, but since the whole 'straight' ordeal was thrown out the window...

"Where are you going, we haven't even got the sugar yet!" She called after him, running carefully with the broomstick. He skidded down another isle and towards the sugar and flour, stopping and turning around. In time to see an orange blur swing past him and smack open a bag of flower. "Whoops."

"Whoops, indeed." He said, brushing the powdery white substance out of his hair and off his shirt. She giggled.

"I guess we'll be getting flour, too. We were running low anyway." She said, slashing the broom sideways, Sirius colliding his pink one with hers and hitting the already once mutilated flour bag, dousing Michelle in white.

Sirius laughed loudly as Michelle brushed the flour from her hair and face, adding more of the white powder into the air. She coughed and smiled weakly, putting the broom down and picking up the broken bag. "Lets... go and put this in a bag, buy it and then continue destroying the store."

Sirius agreed and soon they were in check-out, holding a ceaselessly pouring bag of flour and earning stares. Sirius paid for the flour, while Michelle put it in a bag and smiled. "Lets get the sugar, and then we can go get the milk?"

He nodded, walking with Michelle towards the isle they made a mess in, sheepishly grabbing a bag of sugar and making their way towards the dairy section. Sirius wondered what kind of trouble Michelle could possibly get them into in the dairy section, but he didn't put it past her to think of something. Wouldn't you know, he was right.

"Sirius! Catch!" Michelle called, picking an egg from the carton and throwing it at Sirius.

Blinking, Sirius stuck out his hand to catch it, but realized that he would end up breaking the egg. Thinking quickly, he grabbed a plastic bag and used that to catch the flying egg. "That...would have been so gross if it had broken." He stated. "I thought I told you I didn't want to make a mess of myself, I don't want to literally be walking bread dough, especially if we're getting in my car afterwards."

She blinked. "Right... well, give me back the egg and we can move on."

He walked closer to her and handed her the unharmed egg from the bag and putting it in the carton, putting it back. They both walked towards the milk, and Michelle grabbed a gallon. She sighed. "I guess we should go and buy this stuff, Deidre will be home soon and she'll want to know where I've been."

Sirius blanched. "Deidre's not going to kill me in my sleep, right?" He sulked playfully, silently meaning the question.

Michelle giggled musically. "No, no. You're gay, right, no harm done!"

Sirius shook his head, "Well, if you're sure, because quite honestly....she scares me," he stated.

"Everyone is scared of her at first, but she's actually an awesome person to be around." Michelle nodded.

Sirius shrugged gracefully. "If you say so," he said. "Although, you live with her, so you'd know her better then I would."

Both of them made their way through the isles, and eventually to the checkout, with the same cashier from before. He eyed them wearily, checking out the items. He stated the price and Sirius handed him the money, Michelle protesting some. "You didn't have to pay, I'm the one using them!"

"What are you doing with them?" Sirius smiled, taking the bag and walking out with her.

"I'm baking. Deidre loves sweets, I can give you some of the cookies if you'd like?" She said, prancing beside him amicably.

"That would be great, thanks."

"No, thank you! I have a half made batter in the fridge, so it would have really sucked if I couldn't finish it." Michelle said honestly, getting into the car again. Sirius started the engine.

The drive back to their homes was quick, the music filtering softly through the speakers. Sirius was speeding a little, so they made it back faster then when they left. Sirius pulled into his driveway and stopped the car, shutting it off. Michelle and him got out of the car, and she grabbed the two bags. Glancing over at her house, she smiled.

"Dee's home already!" she stated. "And...Remus is here...! Well, my cookies won't last long," she commented.

Sirius chuckled, raising an eyebrow at her. "If you and Remus are there, you can save me from your lover's wrath, right?"

"...maybe." Michelle laughed. They both exited the car, and Michelle invited Sirius over. She opened the door. "I'm home, and I've got a stray mutt, too."

"Hey, now, who's a mutt?" He blinked. Sirius stepped in after her, closing the door and smiling warmly at Remus and laughing weakly at the sight of Deidre's glare.

Deidre rolled her eyes, turning back around to face Remus. "Take him to the shelter when you're done, you can't keep him," she stated, taking a few papers and looking them over. "I'd double this order," she said, pointing to an item on the list and showing it to Remus.

"Are you sure?" Remus asked, and Deidre nodded.

"Better to be on the safe side, right?" she asked.

"Deidre! Be nice to Sirius!" Michelle called.

Sirius just stood there, blinking innocently. "Shelter? Oh, hey, that reminds me. I have to get a dog to eat Remus's cat."

Remus peeked at him and stuck his tongue out. "Yeah, right."

Sirius hummed happily, being pulled towards the couches by Michelle and taking his seat next to Remus. Remus slipped whatever document he was holding into an envelope and smiled at Sirius. "You're... white."

Sirius blinked. "What?"

Remus reached over, brushing flour off of him. "I take it Michelle and you were in the market?"

Deidre eyed Sirius for a moment then turned to Michelle. "Broom handle sword fight in the baking goods?" It was more of a statement then a question.

Michelle nodded happily. "It was fun!" she stated.

Sirius nodded. "Actually, it was. Although, we kept getting strange looks from the cashiers," he commented.

"I guess that's good, you bought the flour you destroyed, right?" Remus asked, raising an eyebrow sharply.

"Yes, Remmy, we did." Sirius sighed, rolling his eyes and winking at him. "I think I saw BECKY in the market, but she didn't see me. Heh."

"Good lord, Sirius, lets hope not. She could have followed you home and you would have yourself a stalker." Remus griped, sighing but smiling at the thought. "That would be funny."

"Yeah? Well, I bet you'd love being pegged with rocks and mud every time you came over." Sirius drawled playfully, painfully aware of the scrutiny of his two neighbors.

"Is this the same Becky from the hardware store?" Deidre asked Remus.

Remus nodded. "Why? You're not going to do anything mean, are you?"

Deidre thought it over for a moment. "No, but I can always talk Michelle into doing something."

Michelle saluted. "You name the task, and I'll see what I can do."

"I'd rather not hear it, so I'll leave while the two of you conspire." Remus stood, still clutching the mysterious, in Sirius' opinion, envelope. "Can I come over your house, Sirius?"

"Sure, but first I have to take a shower." He said, pouting. "It's going to get all sticky and gooey."

"Oh, yuck, I didn't think of that." Michelle whined, fussing with her hair.

Deidre and Remus shared a look, snorting before Remus grabbed his friend's hand and directed him outside. "We'll talk later, okay Dee?" Remus said softly, waving goodbye to them both and closing the door. He followed Sirius quietly, opening the door and going inside.

"I'll be back down in ten minutes," Sirius stated, heading up the stairs. Remus nodded, sitting on the couch. He didn't stay there long, getting bored without Sirius there to talk to. Standing, he headed upstairs, deciding to look around the house and see what his long haired friend had done with it. He headed up the stairs, looking at the pictures hanging on the wall as he went.

The first room he went into was Sirius' studio. The once neon green walls were now a deep midnight blue. They sent James to the hardware store to pick up the color, since Remus didn't want to deal with Becky, and Sirius was too scared to. Remus noted Sirius's degrees on the wall next to his desk.

Walking over to the desk, Remus sat down in the chair and picked up a pile of papers off the varnished wood. Looking through them, Remus took note that they were of himself, Lily, James, and Sirius. He laughed softly, reading the comic Sirius had done of the video store. He went through each picture, taking in the design and detail of each. He neared the end of the stack, and was somewhat disappointed. For some reason, he figured that at least one picture would give him a hint about his friend's sexual orientation. A scene with a previous girlfriend, maybe, who knew?

Remus got down to the last two pictures, and was looking over the one on top. Shaking his head, he laughed at the drawing of them painting the house, before moving it away. "Remus, what are you doing in here?" Sirius asked from the door way. He jumped, startled before blinking innocently at Sirius. His eyes met Sirius's and he grinned.

"Nice comics." He said, his eyes trailing down Sirius's hair to his shoulders and down the surprisingly bare chest. _Nice towel_, he thought, admiring his friends abdomen and legs and the scanty towel.

"Uh, thanks." Sirius said, not having caught on to the appreciative staring his friend was giving. Instead, he was more worried on whether or not Remus saw THE pictures. The ones of Remus and himself. "Want coffee? I think I found the coffee pot earlier when I was meandering about. Coffee too."

Remus placed the drawings down, distracted. "Aren't you... going to get dressed first?"

Sirius shrugged, turning away and rubbing his towel teasingly back and forth on his bum, flashing the hallway but not his friend. "My house, I can walk around nude if I want to." Sirius peeked over his shoulder, winked and pulled the towel around himself more. "So, coffee?"

Remus nodded, his cheek a light red. "Yes, please," he said, pulling his eyes away from Sirius's nude body.

Sirius nodded. "Alright, head down stairs and I'll be down in a minute." He stated.

Remus nodded, leaving the studio and walking back down the stairs, that image of a nude Sirius on his mind. He went back and sat on the couch, his cheeks still a faint pink.

"Wow, that was..." Remus sighed, mewing pitifully. _That tease,_ he thought, _he's so... hot._ **_Duh_**, his mind screamed, _that's why you want to jump his bones_. Oh, boy, did he dig himself deep. Not only was Sirius only dressed in a towel, he had no qualms with shaking his ass in the said towel.

"Was what?" Sirius asked, stepping into the room. He had on a pair of silky black pajama pants and a loose, button up shirt that was left undone. His hair was tied back and left over his shoulder.

"Nothing." Remus smiled. He stood up, exhaling slowly rubbing his knuckles against his cheek to feel if they were still warm. They were, he was still flushed. **_You _**_and that **towel**_... he groaned.

"Remus?" Sirius blinked. "Are you... okay?"

Remus nodded, biting his bottom lip. "Yeah, I'm fine," he stated. "Just...go start the coffee, and I'll be there in a minute."

Sirius eyed his friend for a moment, "Well, alright," he said, heading into the kitchen.

Remus sighed, groaning inwardly. _This...is **war**..._, he thought to himself as he stood, plan already formulating in his head. He would begin tomorrow after classes, he knew that he had some sort of clothing that would be considered... sexual. Not sexy, sexual.

He walked into the kitchen, Sirius preparing his own coffee with freshly bought cream and a spoonful of sugar. Remus prepared his with some cream, but that's all. He leaned against the counter, crossing his legs and sipping the coffee, licking the droplet away from the lip of the mug.

Sirius watched Remus drink his coffee, mesmerized. _His tongue! Good lord, his tongue._ "Is it good...?" _Conversation._ _Anything to make you stop, Remmy, it's too good to just watch, I'd want something more to do with that mouth of yours._

"Mmm, yes it is." Remus hummed in delight.

Sirius nodded, sipping his cup of coffee, averting his eyes. He tried thinking of anything that would keep his mind off Remus. He thought of his family, his mother, father, Regulus, but it didn't work. Then he tried the Malfoy's, but that didn't work. He even tried thinking of what it would be like to have sex with Becky, and that didn't work. Only made him feel a little green. Slowly, he looked back over at Remus, who seemed oblivious to the fact that he was staring.

He licked his lips, wetting them thoughtfully and placing his mug down. He took a step forward, opening his mouth to speak and being interrupted with a soft knock and than a horribly loud and rude one. "C-comming!"

Sirius blinked at Remus who shrugged, and waded through the remaining boxes to the door. He peeked through the eyehole and opened it up. He stared at James, raising both eyebrows and then dragging his attention to the shorter and more petite version of... himself. The only major differences were the heights, builds and eye colors. Everything else between the two of them was pretty much similar. "Regulus...?"

"Sirius." Murmured his younger brother, stepping closer and giving a very delicate hug. Sirius hugged back just as lightly, not able to help it.

"Regulus, how are you? Come in, you too Jamsie, want some coffee?" He babbled, dragging his sibling inside. Regulus stumbled after him, his green eyes wide.

"S-Sirius- wait." He whispered.

"Hm?" Sirius turned to his brother, and stared expectantly. Regulus fidgeted some, finding some encouragement from James.

"Siri," He said again, quieter. "Father died. From... lung cancer."

Sirius felt the air get knocked out of him. "What?"

Regulus bit his lip, looking at the ground shyly. Sirius caught his breath. "When exactly, did he die?"

"This morning...."

"Oh."

Regulus looked at his older sibling. "So, are you attending the funeral service?"

Sirius paused, looking momentarily torn before scowling. "Should I? I barely knew the fucking man... all I remember is his temper and chain smoking and alcoholism."

"Sirius, you should go." Remus offered, having overheard. "It might provide some closure."

"Yeah." Sirius scoffed and sobered. He thought about it, his face slackening with a tired grief that shouldn't have made itself present. "Maybe I should, huh?"

"Yes, maybe you should." Regulus said solemnly.

TBC.


	10. Ten

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo  
_**Rating: **R  
**Disclaimer: **_We do not own Harry Potter.  
_**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.**_

_**Okay! **_

_**This is an AU, meaning ALTERNATE, you're following me, right? ALTERNATE UNIVERSE! Okay boys and girls, can we repeat that? VERY GOOD! Now, after me! SLASH, ALTERNATE UNIVERSE! SLASH, ALTERNATE UNIVERSE! SLASH, ALTERNATE UNIVERSE!**_

Also, we are thinking of writing another version of this fic at the end of this one. It will be Regulus and Lucius' side of the story. Voice your opinion on whether or not you would read it. We would very much appreciate it.

Now that we have cleaned up some apparent confusion and advertised a possible fic, on with the story.

* * *

It was the next morning, all had risen early to attend a funeral of a supposed loved one. Sirius had dressed in a pair of black dress pants and a dark button-up collared shirt. Regulus was sitting next to him in the car, wearing a similar outfit, only in a green shirt without sleeves and a stylish cowboy hat on his head. If it was a brighter atmosphere on a different, Sirius would have complimented him. It looked good. 

They arrived at the funeral, sitting in silence inside Sirius's vehicle and watching relatives and family "friends." All were dressed darkly for the occasion, and it seemed that sun was shining way too brightly for a funeral.

"We missed the service." Regulus mused just as quiet as ever.

"Yeah." Sirius grumbled without the same grace. The silence filled the air inside the car before Regulus made the first move to get out. Sirius followed grudgingly.

"I guess it must be pretty pathetic that his only two children didn't show up to the service." Regulus murmured. "It really says something about the kind of man he was."

Sirius didn't respond, instead walking to the grave site where their father's casket was resting in front of a large six foot deep, rectangular hole. They both eyed the means of levering the casket, without commenting.

"It's about time you two came." A beautiful, but angry looking woman hissed.

"Mother." Sirius and Regulus echoed.

"Where have you two been?" She demanded, hands on her hips. "The service started an hour ago!"

Sirius shrugged, shoving his hands into his pockets. "I guess neither of us were ready for it," he lied. Truth was, neither of them wanted to be there because they hated the man.

Mrs. Black scoffed. "I don't care! You should have been here when the service started just like everyone else!"

"Mother, please, don't do this here." Regulus pleaded.

Mrs. Black glared slightly. "Take off that damn hat, you're at a funeral, not a rodeo."

Regulus sighed, "Yes ma'am." He muttered, pulling the hat from his head. Sirius frowned at Regulus, taking the hat and putting it back on his younger brother.

"Keep it on, it looks good." He said, pointedly looking at his mother. "We're here, aren't we? Get over it."

Regulus took his hat off, covering his face with it when he predicted his mother's outburst. He heard a sharp intake of breath but no obnoxiously loud, harsh words. He peeked over his hat, holding it so that his eyes barely peeked over the rim.

Sirius had his eyes rolled upwards with an arm around their mother's shoulders, while she cried mutely into his chest. As people slowly made there way over, her sobs lessened until she had almost stopped. Pulling away, Mrs. Black grabbed her white handkerchief from her bag and blew her nose. Sirius escorted her to the seat closest to the top of the casket and stood behind her, idly wiping his shirt.

Regulus walked up next to Sirius and stood by him. He kept his hat in his hands, down by his side, as not to upset his mother further. Everyone waited patiently as the minister walked up, opened up his bible, and began to read.

Sirius only paid partial attention as the man droned on with his monotone voice. He observed the people, with their genuine grief. He glanced at the casket, memorizing the different flowers on it. Sirius's mind dulled the event, making everything seem suspended in time.

Neither of his best friends came, which didn't surprise him. His family wasn't exactly friendly to them.

Sirius breathed in slowly, glancing at his mother and looking past her at the others in his family. Uncles, Aunts, cousins and grandparents. Brothers and sisters, all sobbing. He didn't get it. All he had experienced from his father was grief, and they were crying over him?

After another thirty minutes, the Minister was finished, and Mr. Black was lowered into the ground. Mrs. Black broke out into another round of crying, as did many of the other family members. Sirius stood there, not crying, not frowning, nothing. He wasn't going to be sad over the death of a man who made his life hell.

Slowly, people left, leaving Sirius and Regulus to escort their mother to her car. After she was gone, Regulus replaced the hat on his head, and they went to Sirius' car.

Regulus sighed, sliding into the passenger seat of the car. "Honestly, Sirius, are you upset? Because, I don't know what the fuck I want to think..."

Sirius shrugged, starting the car and driving it out of town so that they could go to the city that was two hours away. He could talk to Regulus and get to know his brother more, after all, he only just met up with him.

"Regulus, did you just say the word 'fuck'?" Sirius smiled, leaving the radio off so that he could hear his soft spoken sibling.

"...Yes." He sulked, sinking into the seat. "Seriously, what do you feel?"

"Nothing, I care but at the same time I don't. The only material connection to that man is the blood in our veins, nothing else." Sirius said bluntly.

Regulus sighed. "He was our father, though..." he stated. "Aren't you even a little sad that he's gone?"

Sirius shook his head. "I can't say that I am. He did nothing but make my life hell and I hardly knew him, so why should I mourn for a man I don't know?"

"I didn't like him either, but stop and think Sirius, he's not coming back!" Regulus exclaimed. He raised his hands over his face, pressing the balls of his hands against his eyes, breathing in slowly.

"Yeah, I know." Sirius grumbled, stopping at a light and watching the light. "He was our father, Regulus, but he shipped me away from you and my friends, he had me live with his brother, his sister-in-law and then there's our dearest cousin."

Regulus turned, watching Sirius's hands grip the steering wheel furiously. He glanced at Sirius's face and bit his lip, about to interject when Sirius continued.

"I know that you only moved into the Malfoy's house in the next town, but they shipped me all the way across the country. I didn't know him, but I'd say that putting up with his alcoholic rages was better than living with Bellatrix. I had to ride all the way there with her...."

Regulus shook his head. "I know you hate her, and him, but think about it, if he hadn't sent you away, you wouldn't be who you are now," he stated.

Sirius sighed. "I know... That's what scares me, though! Sending me away was the most horrible thing he ever did, but the best thing at the same time! But I'm not going to be sad just because he's dead, so drop it!"

Regulus sunk further into the chair, away from his brother. "Alright...." he muttered, looking out the window.

Sirius sighed, rubbing his forehead. "Sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you," he muttered.

Regulus nodded. "It's alright, I understand that you're upset."

"And that's selfish of me, because obviously you are too and I'm not helping." Sirius sighed again, reaching over and pulling the front of Regulus' hat over his face, smiling. "So, we're getting food and we'll share the details of our lives apart. Happier stuff, you know? Some drama, too, can't live life without drama."

Regulus gave him a small pout, fixing his hat and smiling back. "Of course."

The rest of the ride was in silence, both of them thinking about their past so that they could have a few important and even non-important stories to tell. They arrived at a restaurant that Sirius picked, having experienced the food and enjoyed it all immensely.

"I've been here twice, already, what about you? Sirius inquired, stopping the car and sort of amused that the two were pretty much properly dressed for the diner. Regulus took his hat off, placing it on the seat.

"I've been here once or twice with Lucius." Regulus said, getting out of the car. "I really enjoyed their banana cream pies."

"Really?" Sirius grinned at him, having closed the door after Regulus finished his statement. "Well, then, shall we?"

The two of them walked up the small set of steps, entering the lavishly decorated diner. Despite the atmosphere, people were there in jeans and t-shirts. It was one of the more styled restaurants that allowed casually dressed citizens. As long as they had money, they were fine.

A waiter walked up to them, smiling jovially. "Table for two, gentlemen?"

Sirius nodded. "Preferably a booth, if it's not too much trouble."

The waiter shook his head. "No trouble at all, right this way," he said, grabbing two menus and walking towards the left side of the building. He gave them a booth by the large bay window, placing the menus down and waiting for Sirius and Regulus to sit down. They ordered their drinks, and started looking through their menus before the waiter left.

"So, how was life at the Malfoy Manor?" Sirius questioned, closing his menu and placing it on the table. Regulus did the same and ran his hand through his hair, glancing out the window for a long moment before smiling at Sirius.

"It was pretty nice, it wasn't as though I was left out. I was actually very spoiled." Regulus stated. "I did well in school, I met interesting people, dating only a couple times. I was around... fifteen when I hid away in my room alot. I read books, wrote stories and didn't really do much of socializing. Big surprise, no?"

Sirius chuckled, folding his hands on the table and fidgeting in his seat a bit. "So what about Lucius? How did you two hit it off? If I remember correctly, you fancied him something terrible."

Regulus shook his head, smiling at the waiter who returned with their beverages, and took their order, before taking their menus and leaving. He stirred his lemon iced-tea, staring at the drink with a soft, sad look. "It wasn't just a crush, Sirius, I really do love him. He's getting married, though."

"To who?" Sirius spluttered, coughing on his drink.

"Narcissia." The green-eyed man sighed, sipping his drink. "Lucius and I had a brief relationship, though. I think it was more of an experiment for him. He ended it and proposed to Narcissia."

Sirius shook his head with a sigh, staring at his brother. "That sucks, Regulus," he commented.

Regulus shrugged, placing the glass on the table, rolling it between his hands. "I guess... it just wasn't supposed to be, but I can't help but love him."

"Well, if he's getting married, why are you still pining over him?" Sirius asked. "Not to sound insensitive or anything, but if it's over between the two of you, and he's getting married, why don't you look for someone else?"

"I'm not interested in anyone." Regulus sulked, drinking from his straw. "Not many people really notice me, either, and if they do they're not gay. Or very interesting." He admitted.

The waiter came back, smiling charmingly at the both of them. "I'm sorry for the delay, are you ready to order?"

Regulus and Sirius ordered something, handing the waiter the menus before looking back at each other to pick up the conversation again. "What about him? I bet he's gay." Sirius grinned.

Regulus blinked, glancing at the waiter. "...maybe." His eyes trailed lower to the waiter's ass before he blushed. Sirius roared with laughter, causing others to stare. He was a person that couldn't help but attract attention. No matter where he went.

"Sirius." Regulus whined. He was relieved, though, to talk to Sirius and get the stuff with Lucius and the weight of the funeral off his chest.

Sirius grinned as his laughter died down. "I'm sorry, Regulus, but that's the funniest thing ever," he stated. "You're not supposed to blush while you check out a guy's ass."

Regulus' eyes widened and he threw his napkin at Sirius. "Would you keep your voice down!" he hissed softly.

Sirius smiled, nodding and throwing the napkin back at the other man. "Yeah, sure, sorry," he remarked, still grinning. "So... if it turns out he's gay, would you go for him?"

Regulus rolled his eyes, resting his chin on his hand, staring out the window. "Maybe..." he mumbled.

"Maybe, he says." Sirius grumbled sarcastically.

Time passed quickly, their conversation stalled mildly from the arrival and consumption of their food. Soon after they had finished, Sirius paid the tab and left a generous tip. He had considered leaving his brother's number, but he didn't know it and Regulus wouldn't give it to him.

The both of them drove back to the town, most of the ride in silence, the other half spend bickering over the radio. Sirius dropped Regulus off, remembering the place and having Regulus write his number down on the back of a receipt.

"I didn't want you to give it to the waiter." Regulus pouted. "I would have died of embarrassment."

"Who's to say I won't give it to him now?" Sirius asked.

Regulus glared at his brother, smacking him lightly with the hat. "You don't know my number," he stated, sticking his tongue out at Sirius and waving the small paper.

Sirius grinned. "Just wait until I find out what it is, then you're in trouble." He teased, reaching for the paper and trying to snatch it away.

Regulus' eyes widened and he held the paper away from his older sibling. "Sirius, don't you even think it. My life is quite peaceful, and I don't need you to mess it up by giving my number out to every guy you think is gay."

"Not every guy!" Sirius countered. "Just the ones that I think are good for you!"

Regulus looked mildly miffed. "Like I said! I don't need you handing out my number to every guy you think is gay!"

"Fine, fine." Sirius shrugged. "What if I find out that they ARE gay, hm?"

"No, Sirius." Regulus smiled, handing the paper over to him. "And if I have any weird phone calls from anyone I don't know, I'm going to tell Remus on you."

Sirius pouted, tucking the number away in his pocket. "Why Remus? Why can't you tell James or something?"

"James would find it funny, Remus would knock you into place." The green-eyed man said with an amused smirk, waving and walking towards his house.

"Damn."

Sirius changed gears, reversing out of Regulus' driveway and making his way towards the nearest convenience store. He wanted some chocolate mint-chip ice cream for the hell of it. Why not, right?

After getting what he needed from the store, he drove home only to be surprised at the sight of Remus on the doorstep with a small black bundle in his arms. Sirius grabbed the ice cream and stepped out of the car, locking it and walking towards his friend.

Remus glanced at him with a beaming grin, just as the black bundle squeaked and yelped playfully at Sirius. Sirius nearly dropped the ice cream.

Remus stood and bent over, putting the little black dog on the ground. Yelping, it bounded over to Sirius, nearly tripping over its own feet.

Sirius chuckled, kneeling down, setting the ice cream on the ground and picking up the little dog. "Now your cats are in trouble," he said as the dog licked his face.

Remus rolled his eyes, walking over to Sirius. "I'm sure they can handle themselves. After all, the dog trips over his own four feet."

Sirius glared playfully. "He's still a puppy, that'll change." He defended with a pout. He pulled the dog off of the ground and cuddled him against his chest affectionately. Sirius reached placed the bag in Remus's hands with a grin before unlocking the door and walking inside. "Aww, the wittle puppy..." He cooed, rubbing his nose against the dog's rather cold and wet one. He wrinkled his nose but made no other effort to wipe the wetness away. Remus stared, blinking and closing the door.

"Cute, isn't he?" He drawled, silently delighted to see his friend this way. "I know that I probably should have waited for you to get your home settled, but with all the unpleasant excitement going on, I figured a dog would cheer you up."

"Thank you, Remus. Where'd you get him?"

Sirius placed the dog down, watching the excited black dog sniff all of the boxes that he had left to unpack.

"I got him from a friend, he was selling them." Remus replied, helping himself to the ice cream. Sirius didn't object and merely grabbed a spoon. They both ate out of the carton, sitting on the floor and watching the dog scamper around. "What do you want to name him?"

"I haven't really thought about it... any ideas?" Sirius sucked on the spoon in thought, Remus watching him with his mouth open.

"Padfoot..." Sirius looked over at him and Remus blinked, trying to resist the erge to blush. "Padfoot! You can give him your childhood nickname!"

Sirius seemed to think this over a bit, rolling the idea around in his mind. "It'll probably cause a lot of confusion..."

"It's cute... and better than Snuffles."

Sirius wrinkled at the thought of Snuffles, his mother's annoying Yorkshire terrier. It was one of those really ugly hairy dogs, that does nothing but bark at everything, including its own shadow, and it like, the size of your foot. An ankle bitter.

Sirius blinked. "Wait... you think my nickname's cute? What else do you think is cute?" He stretched out languidly, putting on a playful show and not realizing how much Remus was enjoying.

"You, cute? Hardly." Remus teased, chuckling. "Your nickname's adorable, at least. I guess you could say it makes up for the rest of you."

"Remus!" He gasped, only mildly hurt. "That's awful, apologize to me!"

"Sorry?"

"On your knees!" Sirius declared, laughing. Remus blushed heavily. Turning away, Remus watched the small puppy run around the room. "Come on, Moony, apologize to me the right way and get on your knees!" he continued to joke.

Remus shook his head, small smile dancing across his lips. "Sir Padfoot, I refuse to get on my knees just because you wish it," he said in a cheesy accent.

Sirius pouted lightly. "You're know fun," he said. "but...where did you learn to pull off an accent like that?"

Remus sighed. "Had you gone to high school with us, you could probably do the same. That is, if you took drama anyway."

Sirius's eyes widened. "Drama? No way." He paused before breaking out into a large, impish grin. "You're totally serious!"

"What... what? What's so funny!?" Remus inquired quickly, his narrowing suspiciously.

"Do it again."

"Do what again?"

"The accent!" Sirius declared. "What did you act out, anyways? Whatever, do the accent! What other accents do you know? What about Australian? Can you do that?" he babbled away in excited amusement.

Remus shook his head, laughing softly. "Really, Sirius, I think you've had enough ice cream," he said, pulling the ice cream away.

"Do it again!"

Remus rolled his eyes. "You are so incorrigible," he said in the same accent. "There are you happy now?"

Sirius grinned and nodded. "It's funny!"

"It's annoying," Remus countered.

"No way, I think it's nifty." Sirius said, pulling the ice cream back and taking a big spoonful of it and cramming it into his mouth. Remus giggled helplessly, falling backwards. As his back collided with the floor, he came face to face with the little black dog. Padfoot. The dog's little, slimy pink tongue lulled for a moment as the brown eyes considered Remus thoughtfully. Just as Remus was getting up, the dog pounced and lapped at his face.

"Ack, ew! Padfoot!" He sat straight up, wiping his face immediately, trying to ignore Sirius's uproarious laughter. "Shut up, Sirius, it's not funny. Ew. This is why I have cats."

"Uh-huh." Sirius snickered, patting the dogs head. "Good boy, Padfoot, good puppy."

Remus pouted, glancing over at his companion with a soft, warm grin. Too cute, he thought affectionately.

"You know, the library's finished it's changes. It'll have a grand opening in three days."

Sirius narrowed his eyes playfully. "So...are you going to tell me what it's been turned into?" he asked.

Remus shook his head. "My secret, at least for three more days."

Sirius sighed. "And what if I die before I can find out? How will you feel then, knowing you didn't tell me!"

Remus rolled his eyes, doubting that Sirius would be dead in three days. "I'm sure I'll get over it," he teased.

Sirius chuckled, pulling another spoonful of melting ice cream into his mouth and licking the inside dip of the spoon pointedly in front of Remus. "I see how it is."

Remus watched Sirius raise the spoon into the air, ranting and rattling about something. There was a small amount of ice cream left on the spoon, and he was just waiting for it to fall. Hopefully on Sirius, he mused.

In the middle of Sirius's rant, Remus's wish came true and the little glob of ice cream dropped onto Sirius's nose, effectively shutting him up. He laughed loudly, amused when Sirius's face took on a shocked expression and then a cross-eyed look.

Sirius shook his head, laughing slightly. "Damn ice cream, it's out to get me," he stated.

Remus rolled his eyes, leaning over and reaching up with his hand. Using his index finger, he started at the bridge of Sirius nose, slowly pulling his finger down, collecting the fallen ice cream. Pulling away, Remus sat back in his original spot, totally aware he had Sirius attention. "I think you're just a messy eater," he countered, licking the ice cream off his finger with the tip of his tongue.

"Y-yeah." Sirius breathed, blushing brightly and digging into the ice cream container with extreme concentration. He scraped the bottom of the box with the spoon, pulling the utensil out and putting it in his mouth and directing his eyes towards the ceiling.

Remus grinned, watching Sirius. "Having trouble Sirius? The ice cream fell from your spoon, not the ceiling. So, as far as you should be concerned, you're a danger to yourself. The ceiling's not out to get you."

Sirius blinked at him, his spoon dangling from his mouth before falling into the container when Sirius spoke. "You never know with this house, Rem. Remember the doorbell? THE PUCE?" He paused, his brow wrinkling as he formed a pitiful expression. "The pink?"

Remus giggled, pulling Sirius's spoon out of the carton and handing it back to his friend. "You do have a point."

"I always have a point... especially-"

Remus blushed. "Shut up. I don't want to hear about your other _points_, Sirius."

"Your loss." The jetty-haired man said with an impish smirk.

Padfoot curled up at Sirius's feet before stretching out lazily. Remus stared.

"Wow, Sirius, he's perfect for you. Lazy, the both of you." He looked thoughtful. "Space consuming, too..."

"Hey!" Sirius pouted. "I am not fat, nor am I overly huge in any way," he muttered.

Remus chuckled. "I didn't say you were fat," he remarked, looking down at the puppy. "I can see I picked the right dog for you though."

Sirius nodded, leaning down to scratch Padfoot behind his ears. "He is a cute little guy." He commented. "I can't wait to send him after your cats, or put him in your bedroom while you sleep."

"Uh-huh." Remus purred, reaching over to pet the dog lightly. "But, I'm afraid, I have to go. I'll see you after class tomorrow, hm? Have to get dog stuff, right? We can do that."

Sirius grinned at him. "Sure, see you."

They stared at each other a long moment before Remus leaned over and hugged him, Sirius returned the hug with one arm, the other keeping balance.

"See you Rem, night."

"...night Sirius, Padfoot."

**TBC.**


	11. Eleven

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo  
_**Rating: R  
****Disclaimer: **_We do not own Harry Potter.  
_**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.**_

* * *

Morning.

Remus smiled, cuddling his orange tabby against his chest while he held his house phone between his ear and shoulder. He was on the phone with a friend who normally babysat his cats. He had two feline companions. Turpentine was currently kneading his shirt, while Felix, his calico, was probably off munching on the tassels of his bed.

"No, no." He chuckled into the mic of the phone. Adjusting Turpentine, he reached into a cabinet and pulled down a can of wet catfood. "I think that instead of going out tomorrow, I'll have a friend stop by here."

He blushed, listening to her cooing. "No, it's not like that." Remus opened the can, biting his lip and putting his tabby down. "I don't have a boyfriend, Angela"

Remus reached into his kitchen drawer, pulling out a fork and serving his animals their food. Once a day, the cats had a half a can of wet food. He laughed into the phone. "Yeah, be suspicious. Uh-huh. You won't believe when I strictly say friend."

He threw the can away and rinsed the fork off, dropping it to the botton of the sink. "He's gorgeous, I just don't know... I mean, he just came back from..." Pause. Blushing and an indignant groan. "How did you know I meant him"

If possible, Remus' blush deepened when he listened to Angela rant. "No! It's not obvious that I like him! ...At least to him it's not..." he grumbled with a sigh. "But, as I've repeatedly said, he's just a friend."

Remus walked out of the kitchen, picking up the few throw pillows his cats had knocked down during their time running around the house. "No, I don't know if he is or not, but I doubt he his." He pouted. "Once you see him, you'll understand why I can doubt it. He's so gorgeous, that I'm sure once he gets on the dating scene, it won't be long before he's got himself a girlfriend."

"It's not as easy as that." He snorted. "Oh yes, 'Sirius, care for some time in the bedroom? I brought handcuffs!'He'll _so _go for that."

He went into the livingroom, plopping gracefully onto his soft and plushy couch, leaning back and curling up into the pillows. He turned the television on, leaving the volume all the way down as he stared blankly at the screen.

"I got him a puppy. We named it Padfoot, after him." Remus murmured, stretching out restlessly. His shop would be opening the day after tomorrow. He was nervous and excited. Angela and Lily couldn't wait either, since they were the only ones who knew about it ahead of time. Co-planners, you know?

Remus sighed. "Alright, Angela, I'll see you tomorrow" he said as she declared she had to go. Hanging up the phone, he dropped it onto the side table before resting his head on the arm rest. Running a hand through his hair, he sighed again, staring up at the ceiling, getting lost in his own thoughts.

He still had some time before he had to be ready for Sirius' arrival. Today, they were going shopping for things for Padfoot. According to Sirius, he needed dog toys, having already chewed up on of the couch pillows. Remus shook his head, thinking about Sirius. He truly did wonder about the other man. Was there a chance that Sirius was gay? Remus certainly hoped so.

It had been a while since Remus had been with someone, and out of everyone, Sirius is who he wanted most. Of course, he still didn't have the time to dwell on that. Today he had quite a bit to do, mainly school and a few errands and more importantly dinner. Sirius was comming over for dinner and he was feeling very excited. In the school-girl way, too. Giggles and all.

Remus placed Turpentine on the ground and went into the other room to remove the cat hairs and lint from his clothes. He was dressed in a pair of forest green corduroy pants and a creamy white button-up shirt. He had class in about an hour. Once he finished cleaning off his clothes, he did the same for his coat and bag before grabbing a bottle of water out of the fridge.

His coat was a rich brown trench that went to his knees and had fur lining the collar. He was well-known for being gay, but even Remus thought the coat was ridiculously effeminate.

The day passed easily, and on his way home he stopped at the store and picked up a few things for dinner and Sirius's dog, Padfoot. Even though he was more partial to cats, he found the dog absolutely adorable. Bringing the dog home had strictly been impulse, and then became more likely a gift for Sirius.

Once he made it home, he deposited the dog items beside the door and set the grocieries in the kitchen. He left them there, figuring he wouldn't need to prepare dinner quite yet. He busied himself with laundry, doing a load and then drying them. Depending, he would iron the clothes or hang them.

Not satisfied with his outfit, he changed into something tighter and blushed slightly when he looked in his tall mirror.

"God, I hope that's not too obvious." He muttered, twirling in the mirror to look himself over. It was quite possibly the tightest pair of shirt and jeans combination he owned. The entired outfit was black and made him look smaller and more petite, but he figured it was fine. No need to wrinkle other clothes pointlessly. It was only Sirius. Right?

Satisfied with his clothes, Remus left the room, heading back downstairs. He still had an hour before he could think of starting dinner, so he went over to the couch and sat down, turning on the TV. After flipping through the channels three times, he shut it off and laid down as Felix climbed onto his chest. He stroked the fur of the cat lazily, drifting from consciencness slowly.

Not long after he fell asleep, Remus was startled awake by the oven's timer. He lie there for a long moment, trying to catch his breath. Remus vaguely remembered what he was dreaming about, but what he remembered stuck with him completely. His body reminded him of just how damn _good _the dream was, though, he was thankful, there was nothing he needed to be... take care of.

Remus stood up, acutely aware that the cats were racing and thumping around upstairs. He turned the oven off, opening it to check the food before closing it and leaving it in the stove. He made lasagna from his mother's recipe book, and was quite pleased at how well it turned out.

Remus started making the salad that was to go with the lasagna. It took him a little over five minutes, then he started on the dressing. Within a few minutes, he was satisfied with the dressing, and put both items in the fridge. Also in the fridge was a turtle cheesecake that was to be for desert.

He licked his lips, wondering is Sirius would like the cheesecake, with all the gooey caramel. He shook his head forcibly, trying to keep the mental images from sprouting. He jumped, shutting the door at the small yelp that came from outside. Smiling, Remus left the kitchen, walked down the hall and opened the front door.

"Hey, Remmie" Sirius greeted with a grin, Padfoot at his feet, jumping up and down wildly, sometimes from side to side.

Remus smiled, letting them both inside the house. "Hello, Sirius, Padfoot." He said, bending down and petting the dog.

Sirius took the small leash off the dog's harness, watching the little black puppy bounce into the house and sniff around. He grinned at Remus and gave him a long considering look. He eyed Remus's outfit slowly, taking in the incredible way the clothes hugged his body. Remus stood up, smiling.

"I hope you still like lasagna, because that's what's for dinner." He murmured. Sirius nodded, taking his coat off and draping it on the coat rack before making his way around the room to stare at different pictures and trinkets. He stood still, stretching with a low groan that made Remus's insides clench.

Remus held his breath, thinking about the way Sirius held him so carefully in his dream. Gentle but possessive as he thrust int"Remus, when was this" Sirius asked, picking up a picture. Remus blushed brightly, shaking his head to clear the previous thoughts and walking over to him to observe the portrait.

"Ah, that was three years ago when my parents and I went to Greece to visit my Uncle." He said softly, his voice breathier than usual.

Sirius glanced at Remus quickly before putting the picture back. "And this"

Remus swallowed, looking at a picture of him and James covered in mud and beaming haplessly at the camera. Lily had taken the picture. In Remus's hand was the hose facing downwards and spraying water and mud upwards. "Aah..." He paused, feeling Sirius's body shift. He was reminded of the beginning of the dream when Sirius adjusted him in his lap before he slowly unbuttoned his shirt. "T-that was the summer after graduation."

Sirius put the picture back, turning to face Remus before placing the back of his hand on Remus's face. "Are you alright, Remus? You look... flushed and your voice is kind of hoarse."

Remus resisted the urge to nuzzle the hand, and swallowed deeply, before nodding. "Y-yes, I'm fine" he said, moving away from Sirius's hand reluctantly. "I think the lasagna is almost done" he said, turning and leaving the room, breathing deeply. Sirius blinked, a little confused by Remus' strange behavior.

In the kitchen, Remus pulled the lasagna from the oven and sit it on the stove, allowing it to cool a little before he cut into it. Leaning against the counter, he tried to regain his composure, taking deep breaths.

"Remus, are you sure you're feeling well" Sirius asked from the door way.

Remus nodded, chewing on the inside of his lip. "I told you, I'm fine" he said with an adorably weak smile. "I hope you like turtle cheesecake."

Sirius gave a quick, soft laugh. "Yeah, I like turtle cheesecake."

Remus prepared two plates with the lasagna and dished the salads into two little salad dishes. He placed them onto the table and poured some tea into two cups, placing them beside their dishes. He wasn't much for wine or milk or juice with dinner, so tea it was. If Sirius wanted anything else, he was welcome to ask.

Sirius leaned his hip against the counter, smoothing out his shirt while watching Remus dance about and prepare the table. "I'm amazed at how you can walk in those pants, Remus, they're really tight." He purred.

Remus placed the salad bowl on the table with a loud clink, remembering those _exact _words from his dream when Sirius unbuttoned his pants and slid his hands in. "Practice, I guess... they're not really as tight as you'd think."

"Really" Sirius murmured, sitting down when Remus stood by his own chair. Remus sat down, his hair falling over his shoulders.

"Yes, really" Remus stated, sipping his tea, attempting to avoid Sirius' gaze. "They just look tight, but aren't all the tight in reality" he explained.

Sirius nodded, taking a bite of the lasagna. "Damn, Remmie, this is awesome" he praised.

Remus shook his head. "Sirius, watch your language at the table" he said softly, eating the lasagna as well.

Sirius grinned, but nodded. "So, what have you been up to all day"

Remus shrugged, taking another sip of his tea. "I had a class this afternoon, so before I went and got things for dinner, then when I got home, I did the laundry."

Sirius stared, smirking some. "My, aren't you just the perfect house-wife."

Remus blushed, cutting his lasagna carefully. "What about you, what did you do today? I do hope your house is in a better state than it was before. You can't live off of unopened boxes forever, you know."

"I know." Sirius chuckled, placing a forkful of food into his mouth and chewing thoughtfully. After swallowing, he opened his mouth to make a small statement. "In fact, I have three quarters of the boxes put away. My rooms are set up and everything."

"Good to hear." Remus smiled. "Did you take the bars off the one room's window"

Sirius shook his head with a grin. "I liked them, so I decided to keep them." He shrugged. "Maybe I'll accessorize to match it"

Remus nearly choked on the piece of lasagna he was eating. "What do you mean...accessorize" he questioned.

Sirius looked thoughtful, shrugging again. "I don't know...but I'm sure I'll figure something out." He grinned, adding another forkful of food into his mouth.

Remus pushed his food around on his plate, staring at it thoughtfully. He was thinking deep when he heard a loud crash followed by rapid barking. He and Sirius made quick eyecontact before pushing away from the table and hurrying into the livingroom.

Turpentine was on the back of the sofa, where little Padfoot couldn't reach. The puppy had knocked over something from the coffee table, but was currently trying in vain to climb up onto the couch. It used all it's strength, hopping up, but never quite made it.

"See? Already vicious and after your furballs."

"I hardly call that piteous dog vicious, Siri." Remus sighed, leaning over to pick up the small black dog. He handed Sirius the dog, and while the black-haired man cooed over the animal, Remus bent down and picked up the broken candy dish.

"I hope that wasn't too expensive, Puppy, because I'll replace if you want." Sirus said, beside himself with joy at the generous view of Remus's backside.

"Don't be silly, Pa-Sirius." Remus stood, turning around and giving Sirius a bemused expression. "That'll need some getting used to, huh? Can't call you Padfoot, so what should I call you"

"Sexy Sirius the stipper." Sirius said, striking a very undynamic pose with the dog in his arms.

"Stripper, eh? Interesting."

Sirius nodded. "Yes, very, would you like to see my dance" he joked.

Remus blushed, walking into the kitchen to dispose of the broken dish. "Maybe some other time..." he muttered.

"What was that" Sirius asked, following him with his eyebrows raised. "I didn't hear you..."

Remus shook his head, smiling. "It's nothing, Sirius" he stated.

"Nothing? If you say so." He pouted. "Anyways, before I get too full from your wonderfully delicious lasagna, I want to try your cheesecake. So bring on the dessert." Sirius chirped, placing the dog back on the floor without being too worried about the possible doom of another item in Remus's house.

"Hm? Alright." Remus said, distracted. He had just watched Sirius bend over just enough that his shirt rode up along his back. There was a small tatoo there, from what he could see, and he was becomming very curious about it.

Taking the turtle cheesecake out of the fridge, he placed it on the counter and cut two slices and placed them on small dishes, handing one to Sirius and keeping on for himself. Picking up his fork, Sirius took a forkful of the cheesecake, bringing it to his lips. Eating the cake, the dark-haired man couldn't help but moan at the delicious taste of it all.

Remus watched as Sirius pink tongue snaked its way around the fork, pulling the cheesecake into his waiting mouth. Swallowing the lump in his throat, Remus sat down with his own piece of cheesecake. "I-I take it you like it" he inquired.

Sirius nodded, turning his attention back to Remus. "This is the best" he commented with a grin.

Remus smiled, his cheeks flushed from watching Sirius tongue his eating utensil. He cut his fork into the dessert and placed it into his mouth, all the while trying to ignore the obnoxious moans and mewls from his friend.

"God, Remus, you rock." Sirius purred, blinking his big blue eyes innocently at Remus. "Can I take some home with me"

"Sirius" Remus laughed. "You can take the entire thing, I'm sure I won't eat it."

"I don't want the whole thing" Sirius said. "That'll all go straight to my thighs. But, I will take some home with me."

Remus shook his head, laughing softly. "Sirius, I doubt anything can go to your thighs" he commented. "You're far too hyper for anything to have time to make you fat."

Sirius grinned. "Yeah, but, I still don't want the whole thing." He said. "Even I won't eat the whole thing."

Remus nodded, finishing with his slice and standing up to wash his dish. "Would you like another piece or are you done for the day"

Sirius held his hand up to decline before sighing and placing his hands over his stomach protectively. "No more! It was delicious but a man can only eat so much." he cried out, laughing. "Why don't you save half of the cake for yourself? You should use a little fat on you, you're skin and bones."

"I am not, Sirius." Remus huffed, grabbing his empty plate and putting it into the sink. "My doctor even says I'm healthy and at a good weight."

"Alright, fine." Sirius leaned back in his chair, gazing at Remus's bum approvingly.

"It's pretty late, Sirius, are you staying the night or heading home" Remus asked softly, placing the clean dishes on the drainboard to drip dry. He dried his hands off, inspecting them before applying a small dallop of lotion onto his hands from the dispenser near the sink.

"Oh, I guess I should head home. I don't have a change of clothes with me and I'm not sleeping in these things..." Sirius stood and stretched before heading over to the opposite side of the kitchen's 'island.' He leaned over and placed his elbows on the cool surface. "I've got to get Padfoot home, feed him... tomorrow I'll probably bathe him and then go to work a bit."

Remus smiled at him affectionately. "Work, hm? What have you been working on"

Sirius blinked innocently. "Stuff"

"Stuff."

The black-haired man laughed and nodded affirmatively. "Stuff, but after all that, would you like to come over for dinner? You invited me here, the least I can do is invite you over my place. I promise it won't be pizza or take-out."

Remus snickered. "You mean you learned to cook, too? I'm impressed."

"What can I say, I am just a man of many talents." Sirius chuckled. "I'll see you later, okay? Wait, where's my puppy"

They stared at eachother silently before they hurried into the livingroom. It had been quiet for a while, now, and they wanted to know if something happened. Sirius grinned. Turpentine was in Padfoot's grasp, while the black puppy was licking his head with enough strength to make the feline's head move with each slobbery stroke.

Sirius turned to Remus, grin plastered on his face. "See, I told you your cats were in trouble" he remarked.

Rolling his eyes, Remus went over and saved his cat of the small puppy. "Gross, Siri, now he's covered in drool" he whined, and Sirius laughed. With a playful glare, Remus handed him the cat. "You get to give him a bath."

"I'm not bathing your cat" Sirius stated, putting the feline back on the floor. "Besides, I think Padfoot will do that for me"

Remus rolled his eyes. "My cats are not going to be covered in drool." He grumbled.

Smirking, Sirius pointed to the cat, now back in Padfoot's grasp. "I think he will be" he countered.

"Ew, no" Remus whined, pulling his cat away from the small dog again. "My poor baby." He cooed, causing Sirius to roll his eyes and pick up his dog.

"Well, I guess I should leave..." Sirius smiled, reaching over to give Remus a one armed hug with two furry bundles in between them both. "I shall see you tomorrow"

Remus smiled warmly at him, nodding. "When should I stop by? You are, after all, making dinner."

"Six-thirty is fine. Five if you want to be early and watch a movie."

Remus laughed. "Five it is."

**TBC.**

_Sorry with the late update, we haven't been able to get online together as much as we would have liked. Please review!_


	12. Twelve

**Title:** Least Expected  
**Authors: **_DemonessOfPunishment_ and _The Demonic Duo  
_**Rating: R  
****Disclaimer: **_We do not own Harry Potter.  
_**Summary: **_Sirius leaves home for an all boys school, returning later to reunite with past friends and notices an unexpected change with one Remus Lupin. It seems that the librarian's tired of being "proper" and "prudish." **AU, SLASH. SBRL.**_

* * *

Sirius sat in his studio, sharpening his dull pencils. Since he got home from Remus' the day before, he'd been drawing like a mad man. He stopped long enough to get a few hours of sleep, and that morning, he went to school, then shopping for the missing ingredients for the dinner he was making. He also rented a pretty decent movie that had a hilarious gay couple as the secondary characters. Once he made the preparations for dinner, he took a shower, washing off the mess he had made.

He thought of himself and Remus, the other man was always on his mind. The pictures had become more detailed as well, most of them now sexual acts between him and his friend. Sirius wasn't sure what he'd do if Remus ever founds these drawings.

He placed his pencils aside onto a rubber pad that was grooved to hold five different pencils and keep them from sliding off the moderately slanted desk. He grabbed some more loose-leaf paper and hovered over the pages. He sketched a cirular shape for the head and then drew a faintly innocent picture of him and Remus. Placing that one aside, he started on something new and didn't bother to stop himself from making it just as dirty as the few other pictures he drew.

Licking his lips, he eyed the picture carefully and placed it aside. He'd need a cold shower after this if he kept it up. His pants were starting to feel a bit too snug. He sketched a picture of him going down on Remus and cleared his throat, staring at the picture and letting his mind wander. Sirius decided to stop, so he placed the pencil back down and pushed away from the desk.

He breathed in slowly, calming himself down some before deciding that if he behaved well enough he'd be able to pass on the cold shower. Standing up, he turned and walked down the stairs, looking at the clock. It was three, so he could probably put the chicken he was marinading overnight in the oven. He had prepared green bean casserole after his errands and had also boiled some potatoes that he could mash up soon.

After Sirius put the chicken in, he took the pot of boiled potatoes, emptying the still warm water into the sink carefully and rinsing them off before dicing them up with a knife, putting butter and milk on them and mixing them in a seperate bowl, mixing it all up into a fine fluff before putting it aside and covering it with foil.

Walking over to the oven, he checked on the green bean casserole. Taking the pot holder, he pulled out the pan and examined it thoroughly. He was certain it would be done by the time Remus arrived. Putting it back inside the oven, he shut the door, and went to the fridge. Reaching inside, he pulled out a soda can and popped the stop, taking a long drink from it.

After downing three quarters of the drink, he slid onto the clean counter and slouched over. He was running out of things to keep himself busy. His house was pretty much packed away and in perfect condition save for two or three boxes. His furniture was safely stored in appropriate places and it was really looking like a home and not a storage unit.

Sirius was taken back by a rather soft knock on the door. He hopped off the counter, cursing when he knocked his drink over. He moved over to the door quickly, wrenching the door open only to blink stupidly at Remus.

Remus smiled back sheepishly, swiping his hair behind his ear. He was dressed in a soft pink button-up shirt with the same black vest when he first saw him. Sirius always loved Remus's outfits, he had a way with making casual clothes look sexy. "Sorry I'm so early, Sirius, but I've had nothing to do all day..."

Sirius grinned, finally saying; "It's okay, really, I was running out of things to do myself so it's all good."

Opening the door wider, Sirius watched Remus walk in, making a quick sweep over him with his eyes. He closed the door with a soft click before following him into the kitchen.

"Don't mind the mess, I was a bit clumbsy when I heard you knock. I thought it was Deidre... she's been giving me... odd looks lately."

Remus laughed, picking up the DVD case curiously. Sirius watched him read the back with a smile before grabbing a few paper towels and wiping up the small mess he made. Throwing away the paper towel mess, Sirius went over to Remus, gaining the other man's attention. "Dinner should be ready in half an hour, want to start the movie?" he asked.

Nodding, Remus walked with Sirius into the living room. Taking the video, Sirius went over and put it in the DVD player, grabbing the remote. Flicking the TV on while he was standing, the dark haired man went over to the couch, sitting next to Remus. "What's for dinner?" Remus questioned.

Sirius shrugged, placing his arms on the back of the couch, one behind Remus. He was struck with a vague thought of how half the cheesy romance movies were like this. All he needed was Remus to lean closer. "I'm not as fancy as you, so we're having chicken, potatoes, and green bean casserole," he stated.

"Doesn't have to be fancy, just edible." Remus teased, pulling his legs onto the couch, his knees brushing Sirius's thighs.

"Well, if I keep an ear open, I'll be able to hear the timer, hm?" Sirius murmured, skipping the previews and playing the movie with his remote. He kept the volume decently low, watching the beginning with mild interest. He'd seen this movie before and had thought it was wonderful, he just hoped Remus thought so as well.

Nodding, Remus sunk further into the couch as the beginning credits began to roll. A little ways into the movie, they watched as the knights rode off on their "horses". Remus found it so funny and ridiculous at the same time, but laughed all the same, as did Sirius. All of the knights were really on foot, with someone beating coconuts behind them.

When the movie was half over, the timer went off, and Sirius reluctantly got up, walking into the kitchen. Grabbing the oven mitt, he pulled down the door, pulling out the casserole and chicken, setting them on the stove top. Leaving against the counter, he waited for the food to cool before he would call Remus in. He could still hear the movie going, and knew he had picked out a good one.

He listened as Remus laughed again, smiling to himself at the musical sound. Getting impatient with the cooling off process, he placed a moderate serving of each on a plate and let it cool seperately while covering the rest and placing it back in the oven to keep it warm.

"Hey, puppy, it's finished." Sirius murmured as he peeked into the other room. "Want to eat it in there or keep it in the kitchen?"

Looking at Sirius, Remus glanced at the television before shrugging. "Which would you prefer?"

"Doesn't matter to me." The black-haired man said as he disappeared into the kitchen again. Remus was about to stand up as Sirius re-entered carrying two plates. He set them onto the table before exiting and returning with two drinks.

Smiling, Sirius sat down and pulled the table closer to them. Deciding against it, he pushed the table forward again and sat on the floor. Just as he was getting comfortable, a black blur appeared and jumped onto the table. Startled, Sirius snatched Padfoot before he could eat or touch anything.

"Bad! No jumping on the furniture!"

Remus laughed softly as Sirius put Padfoot in the hall and told him to stay there. Shaking his head, the long haired man went back over to the couch and sat in front of it. Remus moved down to sit next to him and took the plate handed to him.

Remus took a bite of the chicken and smiled approvingly. "This is great, Sirius," he said, turning to face his friend.

Sirius grinned. "Thanks. My aunts like cook and taught me how during the summer," he explained.

Remus nodded thoughtfully, taking another bite out of the food and watching the movie in silence with Sirius. The movie ended shortly after they both finished their meals, leaving Sirius cleaning up the mess while Remus ejected the movie and placed the dvd back into it's case.

"I'm going to go clean up, Siri, I'll be back down in a moment."

Sirius began washing the dishes, Remus moving up the stairs and walking into the bathroom to clean up. He washed his hands and face and dried them on a towel, gently.

After he approved of his appearance, he stepped out of the bathroom and blinked at the sight of a partially open door, remembering it to be Sirius's drawing studio. Curious, he walked over and peeked inside and turned the light on, blinking at the sight of pictures on Sirius's desk.

Remus glanced at the stairs, then back at the desk. Figuring Sirius would be busy for a while, he went over to the desk and sat down gently in the chair. He knew it was wrong to invade his friend's privacy, but Remus reached out and picked up the pictures from the desk.

Looking at the top two pictures, Remus was shocked to see that his friend had such an avid imagination. The last thing he expected his friend fo draw were scenes with a gay couple.

Flipping through the papers, his cheeks became redder and redder as he realised that it wasn't just a regular gay couple. It was Sirius and himself, he noted as he read a small caption that Sirius sketched into the picture.

"Remus, ya fall in?" Sirius called, causing Remus to jump and put the papers back on the desk hurriedly. Composing himself, he stepped out of the room and bounced down the stairs.

"No, Sirius." He sulked, still slightly red.

Sirius eyed his friend with silent question until he had to ask. "Are you feeling okay?" he asked. "You're turning red." He walked over to Remus and reached out to feel his forehead.

Remus nodded, moving away from the oncoming hand. "I'm fine, Sirius. Just a little hot." he lied.

Sirius blinked. "Well, do you want some ice cream? There's some in the freezer."

Remus sighed with a reassuring smile. "That would be nice," he stated.

The tawny haired man followed his friend into the kitchen, pulling a chair away from the table and sitting down as he watched Sirius take the bowls from the cabinets. He eyed Sirius's shoulders and back with appreciation, trailing his sight to Sirius's ass and smiling. Sirius had a fine behind, and wore pants tight enough for viewing pleasure.

"I've got chocolate and vanilla, want a scoop of each?" Sirius asked, already putting icecream into a bowl.

"Sure."

Sirius closed the cartons of ice cream, putting them away and grabbing two spoons. He placed them into the bowls, handing one to Remus and keeping the other for himself. Remus sat at the table, ice cream in front of him as he slowly ate the frozen treat. He watched Sirius out of the corner of his eyes as he wrapped his tongue around the cold metal spoon, slowly pulling the mixture of ice cream from the surface, into his hot mouth.

Making a somewhat strangled noise, Remus disguised it by putting a spoonful in his mouth and smiling almost too happily at Sirius. Grinning back, Sirius went back to blissfully eating his icecream, leaving Remus flushed and embarassed. Squirming in his seat, he concentrated on his icecream, licking it off of the spoon quietly.

After a long and almost agonizing dessert, they both finished and Sirius was able to rinse the dishes off and smile lazily at Remus.

They both remained in their positions, silent for a moment until Sirius asked Remus a question.

"Do you have plans for tomorrow?"

Remus pondered this for a long moment, rolling his plans over in his mind. He had morning classes the next day, and he also had some business to attend to concerning the library, but the afternoon was mostly free and he told Sirius this.

Sirius smiled, nodding and dried his hands off before striding over to Remus.

"That's fine, for me." Stated Sirius casually. "I've got work in the morning, and I'm sure by the time you're finished with your things, I'll be done. Want to come over again?" He paused. "Or we can meet somewhere."

Remus beamed. "We can meet at that restaraunt again, if you want. I'm usually pretty hungry after class and work and such."

Sirius chuckled, accepting the deal, allowing Remus to stand up before staring at him in an almost akward silence. They both moved into the livingroom and for the longest while they were silent, taking eachother in.

Remus had his arms hanging loosely by his side, staring shyly at the ground and thinking of the pictures that he found in Sirius's miniature studio up the stairs. He wondered briefly if he was reading too much into the pictures. Sure, the picture looked like him in a sense, but it didn't necessarily have to be him. It could have just been a coincidence.

Looking up at Sirius who seemed to get more flustered and anxious with the silence, he smiled and wondered if he should take the chance. Sirius obviously wasn't opposed to it, and if he were to reject Remus's advances, they'd still be friends, right? Sure, his heart would rip through the walls of his stomach and lie in it like a heavy weight, but he wouldn't lose Sirius all together. At least, that's what he hoped.

"You've changed a lot, you know," Remus said timidly, breaking the silence between them. He smiled softly as he continued. "I remember when you had messy hair, those horrid glasses, and didn't care about school. But now, you'd give a few cheerleaders a run for their money."

Sirius couldn't help but grin. "I remember a lot of plaid," he teased. "But, everyone's changed, even our forever dorky friend, James."

"He has, although he can still be immature when he wants." He stated.

Remus nodded, the conversation dropping almost as soon as it started. Sirius squirmed slightly and Remus resisted the erge to giggle at this.

"So, um, I guess you have other places to go, right?" Sirius asked. "I mean, you don't want to spend forever and a day here, and I'm sure you need to get ready for tomorrow."

Remus nodded, smiling slightly at Sirius' childlike shyness. "Yeah, I need to get my books and things ready for tomorrow," he said, walking towards the door with Sirius. "This was fun, we should do it again."

"Really? Well, how about this weekend, at your place?" Sirius suggested, beaming at the other man.

Remus laughed gently. "I'd like that very much," he stated. They both stopped right in front of the door, just standing there. The silence between them was thick, both waiting for the other to end the visit first, but the words never came.

"So, I'll--" They both started at once, then stopped, laughing.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Remus," Sirius said, giving the smaller man a quick hug. Nodding, Remus stared off silently, thinking over the picture once more. With a sigh, he decided to take a chance, stepping up to Sirius, a slightly blush already on his cheeks. "Hey, Remus, are you okay?" he asked.

Remus nodded with a smile, leaning up with a bravery he didn't know he had, and pressed his lips to Sirius'. He could sense the surprise that the cartoonist felt, but refused to give up. Reaching out, his hand grasped the hem of Sirius' shirt, reach up and wrapping an arm around his neck, slowly moving his lips against his.

He became almost giddy, feeling Sirius' arms wrap around his waist, pulling him close as their kiss deepened, feeling the tip of the other man's tongue lap against his bottom lip, asking for entrance. He granted it, parting his lips slightly, feeling the small appendage push forward, exploring every location it could. Remus gasped softly, feeling the feather light touch of Sirius' fingers brushing against his stomach.

They stumbled over eachother, refusing to break the kiss and trying to push closer to the other before finding the doorframe to use as balance. Uncomfortable as it was, Remus refused to break the akward and thrilling kiss and whimpered when Sirius did. Sirius delicately rested his forhead against Remus's, taking his hands out of Remus's shirt while the librarian wondered when that happened. Placing his hands on Remus's hips, he smiled.

"So, this weekend, your place, right?"

Remus stared at him, his heart racing. "...yeah."

Sirius's deep eyes peered at him from under the dark locks, dancing mischieviously. "I'll see you for lunch tomorrow and _definitely _on the weekend."

Remus blushed lightly, beaming at him. "Okay."

Sharing another, tempting kiss, Remus stepped away from the house and walked across the lawn towards his car. Sirius watched him with a small, lopsided grin. He waved, watching Remus drive slowly down the street before he slammed the door and screamed excitedly. He danced and bounced around a bit, sighing in content before catching a glimpse of his neighbor Deidre staring at him.

She stood there, appauled by his behavior. Deidre was in her pyjamas, holding a glass of milk and a motorhead magazine, her eyes widened.

Not at all phased by her non-violent behavior, Sirius beamed, screamed a loud hello, and went running up the stairs to his room like a very excited child.


End file.
